A young girl stands in her bedroom. By complete accident, today, the 19th of june, is this fine girls birthday! She came to life 15 years ago. This young girl was given a name 2 years ago, will you take a stab at guessing it? > Enter name. Lazyass UglyfaceTry again, smartass. > Try again. Lucy Channing > Examine room. Your name is Lucy, and it's your birthday. A lot of guitars are strewn around the room, all of which are your mothers. Between the guitars are a bunch of books, mostly about programming and tea-making and its history. There were more guitars here earlier, but you're halfway through cleaning up your room. There are two doors, one leading towards the front of the train and one towards the back. Neatly stacked in the corner next to your computer are your games and programs on CDs. They're pretty old, but you like to keep them around. Most of your games and programs are on your hard drive these days though. What will you do? > Quickly retrieve arms from bureau. You are confused by this statement. This adventure isn't even visual, and your arms are firmly attached to your shoulders anyway. Look. Wave wave. Jeez. Someone is repeating jokes here. > Check your last creation. You look at your computer, and see the program you're currently working on. You've been trying to recreate the classic game pong in ~ATH. This is the main body: Code: import mother M1; import mother M2; ~ATH(!M1) { } EXECUTE(pong(M2)); THIS.DIE(); Of course, most of the actual stuff takes place in the pong method, and it will only play if your mother somehow got resurrected. You have about a hundred programs that will execute if your mother is somehow resurrected, so you can show them to her if she's somehow resurrected. If you actually want to get something done, you have another trick up your sleeve. You will show it later. > Go south. You take out your compass to check where south is. You exit the room through the back, where the final car of the train is. You are now on the last car, which is the viewing car. You see the landscape speeding around you, and are suddenly overcome by thoughts. Today is your 15th birthday and also the rerelease of the SBURB beta, which was cancelled four years ago due to a lethal bug that would have ended civilization as we know it. Oops. You are going to play it with your friends from the internet, who you hold quite dear. Even if some seem to be from a different planet sometimes. They're probably just trolling, though. You are unaware of the adventure about to begin, and the events that are going to transcribe this day and forward. You are unaware of the true nature of the game, the importance it has and the secrets it hold. You are unaware of the fact that some of your friends are actually aliens, and need you and your human friends to escape from their universe before nearly all its inhabitants are wiped out by some sort of vast Glub. Most of all, you are unaware that the aforementioned bug in the game was never actually fixed.((Image by Shark and Andrew Hussie))
>Be that friend of the girl that likes green and stuff You are now a young boy sitting in the middle of his room. Today, the 19th of June, is TOTALLY NOT his birthday! It was only a few months ago. He still won't mind if you take a try to guess his name! >Poopstuffed Pinkteen What? Well, since you're about to say that Try Again command and we don't want it, let's just reveal this young boy's name You are called Oliver Green, and today it's not your birthday, but you know that it's the birthday of one of your friends, and you plan to give them a gift! Although not sure what it is, though. In your room, you have many games stacked up, either on stands, shelves, around your room or in little mountains in the corner of your room. Right in front of you, it's your computer. It's very advanced so you can run most of your games on it. You have a chest that its about to your right, at the side of a shelf. You also have posters of various games around your room, notably Kirby, there is also an door behind you leading to the living room. >Open chest and retrieve arms from it You already have arms, but you go there and open the chest. It has... one GREEN KIRBY doll, one MARIO doll, one SONIC doll, a CLOUD STRIFE doll, a LINK doll, and a ROVER doll, from Animal Crossing They are very precious to you. You really don't know what you would do if you lost them >Captchalogue MARIO doll and SONIC doll. You captchalogue both, and they fit perfectly in your PUZZLE modus, that is currently empty since you just got it! You also remember that you once had a Tails Doll. That had a little glowing light as if he was a anglerfish. It always scared the creep outta you, but once you opened your chest and he wasn't there anymore. You hope to this day that your grandmother threw him in the trash. Anyways, let's go to the important facts. You are eagerly waiting for the re-release of SBURB Beta, because of a glitch that would probably make humanity extinct. Of course that is not possible, as you think, since no game would be capable of doing that such fact. You, like your friend, is also going to play SBURB Beta with your friends, since you really love to play with friends! Although some joke about being from a different planet sometimes. Although... You have no idea of what you will be dealing with, in the future.
> Become the alien What do you mean, alien? I assure you, this girl is perfectly normal. So normal that there is no way she could possibly be the alien. > Enter Name Boringass Dullbuttsfuck i dont even care > Try again Your name is Hemoss Absens, and it's nowhere near your "birthday" as your friends call it. Since one of your friends "birthdays" are written down on a note in your room, you assume it is indeed their birthday today and you have to do something for them. You don't really mind, though. Helping around is what you do, mostly because you can't do much on your own. > Examine "room" Nothing out of the ordinary here. A small bed, your computer desk and your beloved harp line the back wall. To the left is a miniature table set with some unstuffed plushies, and a dresser leans against the right wall, blocking a window. That same wall is covered from top to bottom with notes tacked to it, of random sizes and colors, except green. You have no idea why you have no green notes. All the windows are boarded up due to the attack that happened a while back, which forced everyone out of the area. Everyone but you, that is. > Observe wall of notes There's a ton of stuff written down, but it's mostly vague and fragmented, like "do w rp -> town game" or "dd -> gut -> me". It probably means a bunch of important stuff, but you're too lazy to remember. After all, you haven't slept in forever and doubt you'll be able to any time soon, what with you friend's "birthday". You have no idea what a birthday is and no idea what any of the things your friends tell you mean, but you know this should be a good day.
> Be the anime coolkid You are now the anime coolkid. Wait, this guy doesn't look like any coolkid of any sort. Just some kid freezing his ass off by a mailbox. > Enter name Doucheface Shitshades....He's apparently so wrapped up in whatever he's doing that he doesn't even respond to the incredibly stupid name you just gave him. > Try again Your name is Chet Brenson, and you are aware that today is one of your friend's birthday. You are currently outside by the mailbox shipping off the totally awesome present you hand picked out from your collection, which you are totally 100% sure that she will love, and not hate like last year. This time you didn't send her Japanese erotica. How were you supposed to know? Your sister always hoarded them in the attic, so you always assumed that they were some sort of amazing anime. Also still no SBURB beta. Damn it, you've been waiting long enough. Did you even sign up for it correctly? You are sure you did. Then what's taking them so long? Eh, a problem for another time. > Examine room You cannot examine room because as said just a few sentences ago, you are currently outside by your mailbox! > Examine yard It's just white. White as long as you can see. God you hate Alaska. It's so cold and stupid an-Oh, your sister is yelling for you to come back inside. Jeez, can't she see you were just in the middle of something? Ugh. So rude. > Examine house It's a nice little log cabin. Well, little by your standards. In reality, it's a huge 2 story log cabin build by your father before he died. Man, your dad was cool. Sadly, the awesomeness of the house is tainted by your sister's old shopping bags and posters of singing douchebags and shit like that being strewn all around the house. There are several rooms that you have not been in, due to them being completely locked up by your sister. >Enter house You slink inside, your sister watching your every move. Goddammit, can't she leave you alone for two seconds?Ugh, today's already shaping up to be a bad day.
> Become another Troll You are now a young troll, standing in his room. > Enter Name Dumbass McDickDenied, now go fuck yourself. > Try again Rakuida KeirlAccepted Your name is Rakuida Keirl, and it isn't your wriggling day. Though it's your friends wriggling day, or 'Birthdays' as humans call them. You aren't really excited about this fact since it's really only another day, but you try to act like you care that she is growing a day older. YOu also picked a little something something out for your friend. > Examine room This is a room in your hive, and is conveniently your room. Looking around you can see that it is a messy place, with your clothes and Sudoku books strewn about. You also have some magic sets lined on a small shelf, on the wall parallel to you. On all walls of the room there are posters about The Beatrolls pinned onto the walls, the band is probably the best band in all of Alternia. On the left side of your room while facing your door, is your grubtop on your special pile of your masks in your collection. On the other side of your room is you is your recuperacoon, a shade of green that matches your olive green blood color. By that recuperacoon is a small pile of pillows so that you can sit down and be comfortable. > Retrieve arms You pick up your arms with... your arms. That really doesn't make sense, but you captchalogue them into your sylladex anyway. > Look at masks You decide to walk over to your pile of masks. Just the same since you last checked. You decide to captchalogue one of your favorite masks, though. A simple mask, the general frowny faced mask. You also decide to get the happy faced mask, since the frowny one looked like it needed a fellow mask. > Retrieve grubtop You pick up your grubtop and look at it. A standard model with a few added perks from yours truly. It works well at holding the vast amount of shit in your drive. > Shut up and do some magic tricks Just what you wanted to do! You are the best at magic tricks. You go to your shelf and pick up a foam ball, you are going to multiply the small ball into four duplicates.You attempt at it, but you miss a step and end up not being able to do it and look like a total fool. You decide to flip the bird to no one, because no one is making you look like a fool in front of no one.You guess you were caught at a bad time, you should do something else. > Do something on that grubtop You decide that you should kill some time on the grub top, so you plop down onto your pile of pillows and do something. > Don't know that you are going to be playing a very dangerous game and that you'll die a few times. You are already on not knowing what will happen, don't worry. You are just sitting there, being useless.
> Introduce a fifth character. Very well. Another young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the nineteenth day of the sixth month, is a day he has been anticipating for a long time. If the dream clouds prove reliable, this is the day he and his friends will all play a game and begin a grand journey of fun. > Enter Name. >OBSESSIVE BOSSYMOUTH. X Fooling around now, are we? That's okay, he can wait while the narration gets over this spike of ignorance. > Michael Shark. There we go. Your name is SHARK. As your name might suggest you are a devoted SHARK-LOVER, and also a drinker of the many fine forms and flavors of SELTZER. Your peers tend to think you are OBSESSED with these things, but you like to think of it as a way of SELF-EXPRESSIONISM. Their opinions matter, though, as you want to be seen as a loved character like the characters in your FAVORITE CLASSIC MOVIES. You also have quite the passion for CLEAVERS, and you keep a DULL KITCHEN KNIFE in your strife sportfolio at all times for any unexpected MONSTER ATTACKS. In a nutshell, you like to keep everything collected with your CALM and TOTALLY CHILLED OUT attitude, with occasional bursts of anger towards the many IGNORANT FOOLS throughout the world. Your chumhandle is underseaCactus and you talk In a fairly classic way of speech. > Observe surroundings. Your room is littered with SELTZER BOTTLES, and a small BOTTLE FORT is in the corner of the room, made completely out of full bottles of the stuff. You also have an interest in ASTRONOMY, and thus a 3D model of the solar system can be found hanging from the ceiling, among the many SHARK and CLASSIC MOVIE POSTERS. > Check Pesterchum You walk to your LAPTOP and open PESTERCHUM, which is probably the best client you can find for chatting with your many friends. On your desktop is also the ECHIDNA BROWSER, which is also the best of its kind, obviously. It looks like quite a few friends of yours are online. You message IE.
> Hemoss: Pester Rakuida -- idlingEndeavor [IE] began trolling twistedFacade [TF] at 12:11 --IE: tfIE: whos bday is it gainIE: tf? IE: aw dammit man-- idlingEndeavor [IE] ceased trolling twistedFacade [TF] at 12:12 -- > Hemoss: be dissapointed You're almost dissapointed, when suddenly... > Hemoss: Get overwhelmed with chats Holy hell, look at all these chats. Yes, it's only two, but you need to split your focus, which you barely have any to start with. > Hemoss: flail arms onto bed and make pthhthpthbt sound You do the thing where you flail arms onto bed and make pthhthpthbt sound.
You get done talking to your friend and plan to travel downstairs to see if your package has arrived yet. -- underseaCactus [UC] began pestering idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:13 -- UC: Hemoss? IE: yea UC: ((roleplay activated)) IE: ((I know.)) UC: Today's the big day! IE: mhhm IE: someones bday rite UC: Yeah, it's Lucy's B-Day. IE: oh yeah IE: lucy UC: I've been preparing a present for her. But it's also the day we play the game! IE: game IE: aw shit IE: thats what that note was UC: You haven't been getting much sleep as usual, I suppose? IE: no not really IE: i dont sleep UC: No wonder you're so forgetful. UC: Anyway, if my dreams tell the truth, it seems that today is the day we get to start the game IE: hhu UC: The SBURB Beta. Don't tell me you forgot to order the game :2 IE: uh IE: im not sure honestly UC: Well I'll have to send you a copy myself over the internet if you don't get a copy. You might have to play a little later than everyone else, though. UC: Hopefully your 'alien' computer will be able to recieve files from 'a different world' UC: Haha. I actually do believe that you and the other three are aliens. UC: Don't try to hide it. IE: uh IE: does that mazke you IE: an alien UC: To you, yes! I'm human, unlike you. IE: im confused IE: if im an alien IE: that makes you an alien IE: to me UC: We're both different races to each other. You're different to me and I'm different to you. UC: That's what an alien is. IE: so IE: ewre both aliens IE: but different aliens??? UC: Alienness is relative. UC: And yes aliennes is a word IE: i feel alienated IE: :s UC: Anyway, I have to go see if the game is here yet. Hopefully my Pops will have gone down into his office. IE: alright UC: I'll talk to you later. Get SBURB, and drink something with caffiene.
You decide to reply back to your friend, having missed the call. [12:15] -- twistedFacade [TF] began trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:15 -- [12:15] TF: SoRrY AbOu7 7hA7 [12:15] IE: its fine [12:15] TF: WaS Ge77InG A Bi7e 7O Ea7 [12:16] TF: NoW 7hEn, yOu wAn7eD 7o kNoW WhO'S BiR7HdAy i7 WaS? [12:16] IE: uc told me [12:16] IE: lucys right [12:16] TF: AlRiGh7y 7HeN [12:16] TF: AnD YeS, LUcYs' [12:16] IE: alright good [12:16] IE: i wass afraid [12:16] IE: i got trjolled [12:17] TF: YoU NeVeR KnOw [12:17] TF: I CoUlD Be 7RoLlInG YoUr rIgH7 nOw [12:17] IE: gdo dammit tf [12:17] IE: why would you do this [12:17] IE: you knowc i forget everything [12:17] TF: WeLl [12:18] TF: OnE) I7 Is fUn [12:18] TF: 7hE EnD [12:18] IE: okay good [12:18] TF: WEll, 7ha7 quirk was hard 7o 7ype [12:18] TF: No more al7erna7ing caps [12:18] TF: sounds like I'm high or some7hing [12:19] TF: Anywho [12:19] TF: You ge7 7ha7 Lucy human a presen7? [12:19] IE: hm [12:19] IE: not sure [12:20] TF: heh [12:20] TF: Well, I did [12:20] TF: And i7 is perfec7 [12:20] TF: Bu7 7he informa7ion of 7he presen7 is disclosed [12:20] IE: alright sure [12:21] TF: If I go7 i7, I would have been blown away [12:21] TF: I7 is perfec7 [12:21] TF: Anyway [12:21] TF: ... [12:21] TF: How has your day been? [12:22] IE: not bad ao far [12:22] TF: Good [12:22] TF: Mines been pre77y nice [12:22] TF: ALrigh7, 7his li77le silence has been qui7e awkward [12:23] TF: Need any7hing else? [12:23] IE: not really [12:23] TF: Alrigh7y [12:23] IE: just wanted to know [12:23] IE: but hey [12:23] TF: kk [12:23] IE: good for you [12:23] IE: getting a gift for lucy [12:23] IE: good work man [12:23] TF: 7hanks [12:23] IE: kudos [12:23] TF: Good for you... if you go7 one [12:23] IE: ill find something [12:24] TF: yeah [12:24] TF: Hives are generally full of crap [12:24] TF: Some crap humans migh7 find in7eres7ing [12:24] IE: maybe [12:24] IE: although they have [12:24] IE: actual crap too [12:24] TF: ... [12:24] TF: Yes [12:24] TF: Yes 7hey do [12:25] TF: Bu7 don'7 send 7hem 7ha7 [12:25] IE: yeah [12:25] IE: good call [12:25] TF: I doub7 7hey fancy some real crap [12:26] TF: So, how abou7 7ha7 Sgrub 7hing? [12:26] IE: yeah [12:26] IE: uc told me bout it [12:26] IE: hate to say it [12:26] IE: but [12:26] IE: i forgodt [12:26] IE: :s [12:26] TF: >.> [12:26] TF: Well [12:26] TF: I7 apparen7ly had some bug 7ha7 could have ended 7he human world [12:26] TF: Sounds fun [12:27] IE: i guess [12:27] IE: i mean [12:27] IE: sounds exciting [12:27] IE: but equally horrific [12:27] TF: Bu7 exci7ing [12:27] IE: but horrific [12:27] TF: Bu7 more impor7ab7ly, exci7ing [12:27] TF: Yeah [12:27] TF: Horrific may no7 be a good 7rai7 [12:28] TF: Bu7 i7 will be exci7ing [12:28] TF: My lusus also kills abunch of 7hings [12:28] TF: So I see 7he daily horrific mu7ila7ed body around my hive [12:28] IE: that doesnt sound fun [12:28] IE: honestly [12:28] IE: warden keeps things tidy [12:29] TF: Yeah, 7hey make 7he place smell [12:29] TF: Bu7 luckily I know how 7o clean i7 up [12:29] TF: And make i7 smell like normal [12:29] IE: good good [120] TF: Seems like I should ge7 going [120] IE: alright sure [120] TF: So 7ha7 was a nice cha7, seeya [120] IE: ill get some stuff done [120] IE: on my end [120] IE: seeya [120] -- twistedFacade [TF] gave up trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 120 --
> Hemoss: x2 log combob -- underseaCactus [UC] began trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:12 -- UC: Hemoss? IE: yea UC: Today's the big day! IE: mhhm IE: someones bday rite UC: Yeah, it's Lucy's B-Day. IE: oh yeah IE: lucy UC: I've been preparing a present for her. But it's also the day we play the game! IE: game IE: aw shit IE: thats what that note was UC: You haven't been getting much sleep as usual, I suppose? IE: no not really IE: i dont sleep UC: No wonder you're so forgetful. UC: Anyway, if my dreams tell the truth, it seems that today is the day we get to start the game IE: hhu UC: The SBURB Beta. Don't tell me you forgot to order the game :2 IE: uh IE: im not sure honestly UC: Well I'll have to send you a copy myself over the internet if you don't get a copy. You might have to play a little later than everyone else, though. UC: Hopefully your 'alien' computer will be able to recieve files from 'a different world' UC: Haha. I actually do believe that you and the other three are aliens. UC: Don't try to hide it. IE: uh IE: does that mazke you IE: an alien UC: To you, yes! I'm human, unlike you. IE: im confused IE: if im an alien IE: that makes you an alien IE: to me UC: We're both different races to each other. You're different to me and I'm different to you. UC: That's what an alien is. IE: so IE: ewre both aliens IE: but different aliens??? UC: Alienness is relative. UC: And yes aliennes is a word IE: i feel alienated IE: :s UC: Anyway, I have to go see if the game is here yet. Hopefully my Pops will have gone down into his office. IE: alright UC: I'll talk to you later. Get SBURB, and drink something with caffiene. -- underseaCactus [UC] gave up trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:24 -- -- twistedFacade [TF] began trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:14 -- TF: SoRrY AbOu7 7hA7 IE: its fine TF: WaS Ge77InG A Bi7e 7O Ea7 TF: NoW 7hEn, yOu wAn7eD 7o kNoW WhO'S BiR7HdAy i7 WaS? IE: uc told me IE: lucys right TF: AlRiGh7y 7HeN TF: AnD YeS, LUcYs' IE: alright good IE: i wass afraid IE: i got trjolled TF: YoU NeVeR KnOw TF: I CoUlD Be 7RoLlInG YoUr rIgH7 nOw IE: gdo dammit tf IE: why would you do this IE: you knowc i forget everything TF: WeLl TF: OnE) I7 Is fUn TF: 7hE EnD IE: okay good TF: WEll, 7ha7 quirk was hard 7o 7ype TF: No more al7erna7ing caps TF: sounds like I'm high or some7hing TF: Anywho TF: You ge7 7ha7 Lucy human a presen7? IE: hm IE: not sure TF: heh TF: Well, I did TF: And i7 is perfec7 TF: Bu7 7he informa7ion of 7he presen7 is disclosed IE: alright sure TF: If I go7 i7, I would have been blown away TF: I7 is perfec7 TF: Anyway TF: ... TF: How has your day been? IE: not bad ao far TF: Good TF: Mines been pre77y nice TF: ALrigh7, 7his li77le silence has been qui7e awkward TF: Need any7hing else? IE: not really TF: Alrigh7y IE: just wanted to know IE: but hey TF: kk IE: good for you IE: getting a gift for lucy IE: good work man TF: 7hanks IE: kudos TF: Good for you... if you go7 one IE: ill find something TF: yeah TF: Hives are generally full of crap TF: Some crap humans migh7 find in7eres7ing IE: maybe IE: although they have IE: actual crap too TF: ... TF: Yes TF: Yes 7hey do TF: Bu7 don'7 send 7hem 7ha7 IE: yeah IE: good call TF: I doub7 7hey fancy some real crap TF: So, how abou7 7ha7 Sgrub 7hing? IE: yeah IE: uc told me bout it IE: hate to say it IE: but IE: i forgodt IE: :s TF: >.> TF: Well TF: I7 apparen7ly had some bug 7ha7 could have ended 7he human world TF: Sounds fun IE: i guess IE: i mean IE: sounds exciting IE: but equally horrific TF: Bu7 exci7ing IE: but horrific TF: Bu7 more impor7ab7ly, exci7ing TF: Yeah TF: Horrific may no7 be a good 7rai7 TF: Bu7 i7 will be exci7ing TF: My lusus also kills abunch of 7hings TF: So I see 7he daily horrific mu7ila7ed body around my hive IE: that doesnt sound fun IE: honestly IE: warden keeps things tidy TF: Yeah, 7hey make 7he place smell TF: Bu7 luckily I know how 7o clean i7 up TF: And make i7 smell like normal IE: good good TF: Seems like I should ge7 going IE: alright sure TF: So 7ha7 was a nice cha7, seeya IE: ill get some stuff done IE: on my end IE: seeya -- twistedFacade [TF] gave up trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 120 -- You are suddenly overwhelmed with clairvoyance. It was Lucy's birthday? We're playing some game called Sburb or Sgrub? I forgot to get a gift? I'm an alien? It's all so confusing and energy-draining. Too draining for a little troll girl to handle while bedridden and stuck to an IV filled with who knows what. > Hemoss: Call Lusus You call over Warden, your vampire bat lusus. He's very caring and affectionate, even if you're bound to an IV and can't get out much. You curl up with him in your seat with a little squeak.
A young troll should be standing in this room. Well, he's sleeping now it seems. Like every sweep, today is his wriggling day. Hurray. Actually, it's not. But his friends count sweeps in a different manner. So today is his "birthday". Hurray. Like all trolls, he has a name. And, since he's asleep... Wanna try to guess his name? ==>Enter name Stolidnit Lousyfag X Suddenly a sword falls from above, like a guillotine, cutting this dumb joke in two ragged halves. This guy is on the watch even when asleep. Try again? ==>Try again Alucard Klehoma V The pile of stuff in the corner stirs, as if in agreement. Good job, guessed from second try. ==>Examine room Your name is Alucard Klehoma, and you're close to becoming one sweep older. Your room, your current room where you are now, has lots of different stuff. Especially arrows, scattered everywhere. You have no idea what they are doing here, as you never used a bow before. You just dislike it. Your room is scattered with your weapons. You have a variety of removable claws made of different materials. You have a vast collection of posters with dragons. You don't know why, but you have a fascination of these beasts. Maybe because you want to be one of them. You also pride yourself in throwing knives, because you are better than average at this. You have an odd love of things that can harm or kill your enemy from a distance. You suck at using them though.Your trolltag is duskyDragoknight, and ¥ou speak a little like this. Sometimes it"s \/err¥ harrd to underrstand ¥ou.☯ .What are you going to do? ==>Wake up The pile isn't responding. ==>WAKE UP STOLIDNUT A kunai shoots out from a pile, probably trying to mute the source of commands. Then troll's head appears. Sleepy eyes are still closed. This guy is not willing to do anything. ==> Stand up and fight! What the?.. There are no enemies. However, you equip your battle claws. You never know. ==>Captchalogue a pile of shitty arrows You captchalogue all arrows in your room. What are they doing here anyway? Better burn them, it's getting cold. ==>Go in the eastern room You open a door and enter another room. There's a furnace here. Your lusus is nursing the fire. You decide to give him a break, let arrows work instead of your Tiggy. You return to your sleeping room and decide to take another nap. Something worries you though. Maybe it's because of your "birthday"?
> Shark: Prepare to travel downstairs to check your mailbox. Since you've been GROUNDED, your POPS is probably on high alert downstairs for you. You thought you heard him go into his BASEMENT OFFICE, though, so it's time to prepare to go see if you package has arrived. > Shark: Captchalogue your kitchen knife. You don't have to, your DULL KITCHEN KNIFE is already in your STRIFE PORTFOLIO. You do captchalogue a bottle of MANGO SELTZER into your STACK MODUS, however. It might be a long trip, and you wouldn't want to get thirsty. > Shark: Exit your room. You go out of your room, make a left, and begin to head down the stairs. On the walls around the house your POPS has hung his many WAR MEDALS and AMERICAN FLAGS. His extreme patriotism really annoys you sometimes. Nevertheless you keep heading down the stairs. But as you near the bottom step, your POPS comes out of nowhere. You totally saw that coming. You're determined to get the package, though, so you stand up to the tall, polo-wearing POPS and prepare to gain your entry to the front porch. "Fight for what you want", as he would say.
> Hemoss: Man up and get hands on SBURB/Sgrub/town game You MANLY-LY-LY put your hands on the keyboard and begin looking it up before you are interrupted by someone once more. -- duskyDragoknight [DD] began trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:47 -- D Yo☯ IE: oh hey dd D He¥a☯ D You said therre is going to be a parrt¥☯ D Orr what?☯ IE: party IE: i dont remember D Orrl¥? It"s about ¥ourr frriend"s birrdda¥☯ D Orr how is it called...☯ IE: uhhhhhhhh D Ummm...☯ IE: i know its IE: lucys bday D Birrthda¥?☯ IE: yeah IE: birthday D Oh☯ D Luc¥, ok☯ D Soooo ._.☯ IE: so what is it D An¥ plans?☯ IE: nm IE: not really D I"m just borred herre...☯ IE: gotta get gifts and shiz D Ma¥be I can find something forr herr too.☯ IE: hopefully IE: yeah actually IE: rakky tlod me IE: wait not rakky IE: mr. cactus guy IE: apparently IE: were playing a game today IE: did you know D I ne\/err underrstood ¥ourr fascination with these mudbloods.☯ IE: ??? IE: aw geez man D The¥ don"t e\/en ha\/e horrns.☯ D What game?☯ IE: i dunno what game IE: juts IE: listen D Yea ¥ea☯ IE: first D Go on☯ IE: shoosh D ._.☯ IE: now then IE: first IE: i dont mind the muddies IE: because im a low caste IE: too IE: second IE: i dunno what game IE: it is IE: but appanretly IE: i should have had it IE: by no2 IE: thats e w IE: dammit D Sometimes it harrd to underrstand ¥ou, frriend.☯ IE: sorry IE: im just IE: sleepy D I know ¥ou arre.☯ D Alrright☯ D Gonna find something forr "Luc¥"s" wrriggling da¥.☯ D Was it Luc¥?☯ IE: lucy yeah IE: ooh yeah IE: i found a note IE: in my room IE: "dd -> gut -> me" IE: what does it mean D Oh ¥eah.☯ D Intescines.☯ IE: intestines IE: dammit muy harp IE: how did i fokrget again IE: oh wait D Yeah ¥eah☯ IE: i always forget. D I"ll get some forr ¥ou.☯ IE: alright thanks IE: also IE: do you know anything IE: about "caffeine" IE: ??? D What I know? Well, if ¥ou see something with this worrd on a pack, thrrow it awa¥ and burrn.☯ IE: um IE: mr. cactus guy IE: told me to drink some D It won"t help ¥ou with ¥ourr insomnia☯ IE: oh okay D Now ¥ou ha\/e to excuse me☯ IE: sure D I"m lea\/ing to find a gift forr ¥ourr budd¥.☯ IE: gotcha IE: see you around D B¥e ( ^ .≡≡. ^ )☯ -- duskyDragoknight [DD] gave up trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 12:57 -- You are once again blinded with science. Caffeine is bad for you, "mudbloods" dont have horns, and you need to hurry up and get this game for fuck's sake. You hop to it on your trusty computer.
> Shark: Dump the Seltzer on your POPS to cover an escape. WHAT?! No, that will never happen. Seltzer has not, is not, and will never be wasted in such a wasteful manner. > Shark: Battle your POPS like an angry sea predator. There has to be a better name for something like that. > Shark: Strife. Strife Initiated. Enemy: POPS. Father figure, somewhat BULKY. Wields his AIR RIFLE. Aggress! You draw your DULL KITCHEN KNIFE and intimidate your POPS with it. You're not going to actually try to hurt him with it, just make him intimated enough to go away. You charge him with the small cleaver but he blocks all of your attacks with his AIR RIFLE BAYONET. He attempts to poke you with the bayonet, to which you shriek backwards. He chases you back up the stairs with his bayonet, and then locks you in your room with the classic chair-under-doorknob trick. > Shark: Asses damages. You didn't get hurt at all during the fight, but your DETERMINATION stat his gone up, but your SELF ESTEEM stat has decreased. You decide to take a rest and try to think a way out of your room. You sit down in front of pesterchum and wait for any messages. In the meantime you drink a bottle of SELTZER and put your PLUSH SHARK HAT on your head. It's so comfy. Your hands fiddle with a small stress-ball shaped like EARTH while you look at your monitor.
> Get up You get up, but you open your laptop just so that if someone were to troll you, they would be met with silence.You hear a noise from downstairs. > Investigate that noise No need for investigation, you already know who it is; your lusus. Most likely back from her daily hunt, which you could not attend for no reason whatsoever. You go downstairs only to find your lusus, Loque'Nahak, also known as 'Hak'. Is bringing in a corpse, a corpse of a dead troll. > Investigate your lusus -- loqueNahak [LN] began talking to twistedFacade [TF] at 12:54 -- [12:54] TF: Wha7 [12:55] TF: 7he heck? [12:55] TF: Why are you bringing a dead 7roll in7o 7he house? [12:55] LN: [12:55] TF: ... [12:55] TF: .... [12:56] TF: I 7hough7 we made a deal 7o no7 bring in corpses [12:56] TF: ea7 your hun7 ou7side [12:56] LN: Purrr [12:56] TF: 7ake i7 ou7side, please -- loqueNahak [LN] gave up talking to twistedFacade [TF] at 12:57 -- You look at your lusus. Though she seems sweet and lovable (Which she is), you are glad you didn't tick her off. She gets mad pretty easily > Problem averted, now go onto all fours and prance around, meowing What? Why would you do that? You don't do what it says, but you humor it by giving out a meow. > Contemplate what just happened Nothing to contemplate, really. But know it smells like lowblood, not the best smell in the world. > Do something else You do something else, like go back to your room and derp around on the good 'ol grubtop
You get bored and decide to message Lucy to wish her a happy birthday. ((sorry for the timestamps, they'll be gone next time.)) [01:05:19] -- underseaCactus [UC] began pestering redesignedPerspective [RP] at 13:05 -- [01:05:26] UC: Lucy! [01:05:47] RP: Hihow are you this fine day *wink* [01:05:50] UC: Happy birthday. [01:06:00] UC: Also, I'm good. [01:06:07] RP: Haha you remembered! Thanks [01:065] UC: Though it appears I have been locked in my room by my Pops. I think the Sburb package is here, but I'm not sure how I'm going to get to it now. [01:066] RP: It's been fun so far I alreadyatemy cake [01:06:50] UC: Cake's good. I prefer Seltzer, though. [01:07:20] RP: Yeah Sburb! [01:072] RP: We'll pick it up at the nextstop [01:079] UC: Alright, cool. [01:07:44] UC: I want to start playing ASAP. [01:07:51] RP: Can'twait [01:08:20] UC: This game lets us see each other in-game, you know. I've already seen you in my golden planet's clouds! [01:089] RP: Oops then I'd better get dressed [01:09:16] RP: Goldenplanet? Earth is blueright? [01:093] UC: Yes. But I'm talking about the planet that I see in my dreams! [01:09:51] RP: All I see in my dreams is a purple room :/ [01:10:07] RP: Still theres tonsofcoolstuffinthere [01:10:22] UC: Oh, you can wake up in your dreams? [01:10:29] UC: Almost everyone I see on my planet is asleep. [01:10:45] RP: Don't we all [01:10:52] RP: I mean metaphoricly [01:11:16] UC: I've been trying to figure out how I can get them to wake up an explore the planet with me, but I don't know. [01:11:40] RP: Sharkpunch them haha [01:12:00] UC: Sharks are so cool, kid. So cool. [01:12:02] RP: :/ [01:12:22] RP: Never noticed that's youropinion on them [01:12:27] UC: I gotta figure out how to get to my package, though, so I'm gonna go. [01:127] RP: Oh! [01:12:44] RP: Gl i guess [01:12:52] UC: It's not an obsession! [01:12:55] UC: and thanks. [01:13:14] RP: Ciao [01:13:18] UC: I'll catch you later, then. [01:13:40] UC: I'll be bach. Yeah, reference to a classic. Look it up. [01:13:43] -- underseaCactus [UC] ceased pestering redesignedPerspective [RP] at 13:13 -- You look at your window. You must get that game, and it looks like that's the only way out. How to get down safely, though.
> Hemoss: Search online for Sburb You are met with only image results of really pale people and green shapes. What's up with that? Either way, you decide to ask a friend about it. -- idlingEndeavor [IE] began trolling twistedFacade [TF] at 13:10 -- IE: tf IE: how exactly do i TF: Yes? IE: how do i get IE: the game TF: Erm... TF: I really have no idea IE: :s IE: thays no good TF: Maybe fa7e will hand us i7 TF: Agreed IE: fates an ass IE: just look at me TF: 7ha7 is already common knowldge TF: Fa7e is cruel IE: id say so TF: And yeas TF: You seem 7o have go77en a pre77y bad par7 of fa7e TF: More worse 7han 7he res7 of i7 IE: i suppose TF: Bu7 hey, you learned 7o live wi7h i7 IE: yeah IE: at least i have that TF: mhm IE: so IE: no idea how to IE: get it TF: Maybe 7ry looking i7 up...? IE: i did TF: Could be downloaded 7hrough a browser IE: theres just pictures n shit TF: 7ha7s no help IE: pictures of pale people IE: arei not useful IE: at all TF: Yes TF: Also qui7e ugly TF: So we are s7uck IE: mhhm IE: well IE: ill ask uc IE: maybe he knows TF: Yeah, hopefully IE: internet ho -- idlingEndeavor [IE] gave up trolling twistedFacade [TF] at 13:16 -- Well, that wasn't very productive. At least we know he's as clueless as you are, meaning you aren't lagging behind like the mentally stunted insomniac you are. Time to call cactus sburb guy man.
((Sorry for the OOC, but my character is not pestering or will be awnsering any pesters until I fix my Pesterchum problem) >Do something on your computer You walk up to your computer, but suddenly you remember that your SBURB copy is supposed to come today! >Rush through the door You kick the door open and rush through the living room. Oh, fuck, there are four doors. One in your front, one that is behind you, that you just left, and two that are both to your right and left. >Go right You walk to the door that is on your right, you open it and... It's the dark room that leads to your basement. For a house on a shoreside, this thing is quite huge. >Turn lights on There are no lights here! >Go blind and enter basement You try to search for your basement. However, you fall down through the hole you were just searching about. Fortunately you don't break all your bones, but you fall unconcious.
> Rakuida: Be stumped That you are stumped. How does one retrieve Sgrub? Or Sburb, whatever > Get up You get up and look around for your trusty blade ==> You find your Two-handed greatsword propped up on the side of your recuperacoon.You captchalogue it and put it into your strife specibi. > Go to sleep and look at the clouds No thanks, you aren't tired at all to seek information from the clouds on the purple moon. > Then what will you do? You decide to troll a human to seek for help, then.You should try the Lucy girl.
> Hemoss: Imagine how flustered cactus sburb guy man will be when you call him that. You take a minute or two to metaphorically roll around in the amazingness that will be cactus sburb guy man's flusteredness. > Hemoss: Call cactus sburb guy man "cactus sburb guy man" -- idlingEndeavor [IE] began trolling underseaCactus [UC] at 13:20 -- IE: call cactus sburb guy man??? IE: how do i get IE: the game UC: You just..order it I guess. IE: order id IE: but IE: i looked it up IE: and got dumb pictures IE: n shit UC: Hm. UC: You'll probably have to get it off of one of your alien friends, then. IE: rakky doesnt have it IE: dd doesnt have it UC: There's probably a different version in your world. IE: rakkuy knows about it IE: but none of us IE: have the game UC: You'll get it somehow, the clouds said so. UC: Because I've seen you in the game. IE: oh IE: really??? UC: We could use a good coder to create some sort of file to send to you. IE: yea IE: augh let me think UC: Once I get the game from outside I'll see if I can find someone to do that. UC: But I hate programming, it's just too complicated. IE: alright IE: i mean UC: Well, more so boring. IE: you could just send IE: the files IE: and i could bunch it IE: folders and stuff UC: Sounds like a plan. I UC: I need to go jump out my window to get it though. UC: So I'll see you in a bit. IE: oh shoot IE: good luck man -- underseaCactus [UC] gave up trolling idlingEndeavor [IE] at 13:25 -- > Hemoss: Commend UC's infinite courage and bravery You spend a solid minute standing up and saluting your computer screen before you realize that this is stupid and a waste of time. Either way, you need to get this game and have no flipping idea how to get it.
