Corrupt a wish V.2

Granted. Unfortunately, it's union.

I wish there were more crows.

 

Granted. One constantly caws in your ear, the rest serve me in robbing every shiny thing.

I wish to be in a world of pure imagination.

 

granted, you are in a dystopian imagination

I wish this wish not be corrupted

 

granted. instead, your mind is corrupted, robbing you of the youthful innocence you once possessed and permanently casting a shadow of crippling pessimism on your every waking moment.

i wish i had some bread

 

Granted, but the staff doesn't want you to be the owner.

I wish I have a Glitch to be my assistance.

 

g̴r̷a̵n̸t̷e̶d̶,̴ ̶b̴u̶t̸ ̷5̷0̸0̵ ̶I̴n̵t̴e̴r̷n̸a̴l̵ ̶S̵e̶r̸v̷e̵r̵ ̷E̴r̵r̶o̵r̷

I wish YT worked again

 

Granted. It only has deep fried meme compilations.

I wish for my phone to be charged.

 

Granted. Your phone is charged with three counts of premeditated murder and sentenced to six life sentences.

I wish the minimum wage in America was 15 dollars an hour

 

Granted, but the companies increase their prices to retain their profit margins.

I wish for rain.

 

Granted. YOU MUST BUILD AN ARK.

I wish for Hornet and the Hollow Knight to be friends and to defeat whatever new threat faces them!

 

Granted. The threat is life and they begin to systematically purge all organic material from existence before committing duel suicide

I wish for actually good colour pencils.

 

Granted, but being so nice, artists keep trying to take them for themselves.

I wish me and Priscila the Half-Breed could be friends and we could drank.

 

granted. then they died

I wish I had a new GPU (this 1 gave out)

 

Granted, but the battery life is terrible and there's an overheating problem.

I wish for more stronk.

 

Granted. You are now Equius.

I wish to scream very quietly.

 

Granted. No one understands your infinite pain.

 

...no wish, no grants, no chocolate!

i wish for chocolate!

 

Granted, you just can't eat it.

I wish for the release of death.

 

Granted. Approaching death releases you and you now live forever.

I wish to wish my wish upon a wish that wishes to wish of a wish which wishes that wish will wish a wish to wish a wish in a wish.

 

granted. i managed to parse that sentence, and ultimately you wished that someone would wish.

so i wish for tasty chocolate i can eat.