Corrupt a wish V.2

Granted, you are now a chair made of ice.

I wish for a perfectly generic object.

 

Granted, it is so generic you put it down and can't tell it apart from anything else.

I wish for three Canadian dollars.

 

Granted, but that's before income tax.

I wish for a knife.

 

Granted, you get stabbed.

I wish for food.

 

Granted, but it is half-digested food.

I wish for a proper sense of humor.

 

Granted, but you only like dark humour.

I wish for a blue rectangle.

 

Granted. Wayland the Smith forges you into the blue rectangle.

I wish for a wash.

 

Granted, it is a brainwash. Welcome to the army, mindslave.

I wish for 6.4 cute.

 

ERROR 404: DOES NOT COMPUTE%£"$ SELF DESTRUCT IN 3.. 2.. 1..

I wish for pancakes

 

Granted, you get sultana pancakes.

I wish for a small fluffy creature capable of killing people on telepathic command.

 

Granted! She is a cream-white hamster called Lisa. Disappointingly, she never ever bothers using her killing power. So now you just have a hamster to care for.

i wish to be softer!

 

Granted, now you are a ball of luff. No bones, flesh, or organs. Just fluff. Unfortunately fluff cannot bear sentience. You are vacuumed.

I wish for a robotic arm instead of my right one.

 

It's a left arm.

I wish for motivation.

 

Granted, you are motivated to slap your family.

I wish for a leg.

 

Granted, it's a table leg.

I wish for a book.

 

Granted, it's a dicshonarie. see what I did there?

I wish for the last school week to be over faster.

 

Granted, everyone in schools gets sick.

I wish for my leg to be able to explode.

 

Granted, your leg will detonate only if you are standing in the 5th circle of hell.

I wish I there was unexplored land on Earth for us to discover.

 

Granted, but you can't access it without hacks until the next update, and even there are only placeholder textures there and a few debug assets.

I wish for more time.

 

Granted, you will die painfully, and live an extra few minutes in that pain.

I wish for seven Australian dollars.