Chucklefish Clash - Christmas Special

Discussion in 'Forum Games' started by Witch Cat, Dec 2, 2017.

  1. Tlactl

    Tlactl Cosmic Narwhal

    I will stay cautious around you from now on
     
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  2. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    that should be easy considering they died. like twice.
     
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  3. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    [​IMG]
    My true love the Portal gave to me, noooooooothing of interest!
    [​IMG]
    The Horse kinda just stays in the background, the Toaster continues his melody of "TOASTERS TOAST TOAST" while the ghost of Witch weeps and corrects him by saying "TOASTERS TOAST BREAD!" Wait, is he a ghost? He seems surprisingly solid with his camo armour and loudspeaker wailing in Toaster's ears. The Dragon gets bored of living and asks Frozen Water to kill him but he refuses due to heartbreak, having seen enough death with his dead boyfriend frolicking around with a skeleton. The Mushroom kinda just sleeps, booo, boring. Kill stuff. And where are the other two? Oh? What's this? Nib and Net are talking? Let's zoom in.

    /////////​

    Nib idly kicks his legs as he sits in silence with Net Neutrality around a campfire, mugs filled with chocolate resting over the fire.

    "Fight's pretty wild so far," Nib said, shattering the silence with his unsteady voice.

    "Yeah," Net replied dryly.

    "Think you'll make it?"

    Net shrugged and resumed to staring at the crackling embers, not saying much else.

    Nib huffed and stared at the fire along with Net, his eyes glazing over and seeming to peer into and beyond the fire, unfocusing as the light danced in hazy streams in his eyes. Should I do it? Nib asked himself, the firelight illuminating the welling tears in his eyes. It's bad, but, they're offering a lot. His gaze drifted back towards Net who was still staring passively into nothingness. I'd be doing them a favour, getting them out of the fight quick and easy, wouldn't even hurt.

    "Hot chocolate's done," Net said, burying his cold hands in his pockets. Nib nodded and slid off the chair, walking over to the fire and picking up Net's mug. He walked back to him and looked at him, and back at the mug, and back at him. Do it for you, do it for you, do it for you.

    "Nib?"

    WHACK!

    With one well-placed blow, Nib shattered the mug over Net's head, causing him to drop instantly. If the blunt force didn't get him, the scalding hot chocolate slowly cooking his brain as it dripped down his head and mixed with his hot blood definitely would.

    Nib sluggishly collapsed onto the chair again. His breath ragged and quick as he heaved. Nib reached out with his shaking hand and took hold of his large, Reese's Pieces mug and sipped it gingerly to calm his nerves.

    This was going to be an interesting battle.
     
  4. The Purple Dragon

    The Purple Dragon Master Astronaut

    Dammit, why didn't they kill me? I had potions at home that needed bottling and they were going to boil over!
     
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  5. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    [​IMG]
    So in short, the sponsors got mad we didn't have a proper family feast so we cancelled some plans and smushed this in. Enjoy an hour of watching animals hungrily try to eat themselves to their deaths!
    [​IMG]
    However, instead of getting our feast memo Frozen Water got the ninja plans for the ninja-themed episode we were planning for his weeb ass and so he just straight up killed Ajit Nib (or Anib) while screaming something about net neutrality while Toaster committed suicide! Well, not intentionally anyway. He tried to tackle Frozen Water but what happens when an electric device touches water, children? Exactly. Horse tried to hop into the fray and gets frozen inside Frozen while he tried to rebuild himself. Purple and Mushroom saw this and decided to just... not go.

    3 people remain! Cast your bets everybody!
     
  6. Pangaea

    Pangaea Forum Moderator

    I feel like frozen water is going to win.
     
    The Purple Dragon likes this.
  7. Jake9039

    Jake9039 Pangalactic Porcupine

    I put 30 pixels on frozen water.
     
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  8. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
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  9. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    [​IMG]

    "Boss?"

    "Yes?"

    "What happened to the Christmas font?"

    "We had it removed, it's almost February, time to retire the Christmas theme."

    "Huh, ok..."
    ///
    "Boss?"

    "Yes?"

    "What's with the font?"

    "What do you mean?"

    "I mean it looks kinda messy,"

    "So?"

    "So... Could we change it?"

    "Why would we? I already paid a lot of money to gain the rights to use this one,"

    "Well I mean, if we make the font prettier, we could attract more people!"

    "It's not like anyone watches us anymore,"

    "Why not?"

    Boss gestures towards the yawning Portal. It's grown.

    "What about Frank?"

    "Frank? Who's Frank?"

    "The Portal!"

    "You named the Portal?"

    "Yeah I mean, calling it "Great Death Portal Whom Lusts For The Lives of Every Innocent" took too long,"

    "Fair 'nuff,"

    "But you didn't answer me,"

    "What?"

    "Why no one watches us anymore,"

    "The Portal is interfering with our cameras, can't shoot anything."

    "But that one contestant shot someone-"

    "Not that type of shoot, idiot."

    "Why don't we just stop filming and move somewhere else?"

    "If anyone tries running away he kills them,"

    "That thing is a he?"

    "Only from 2 to 9."

    "Oh ok, so how do you know he kills the people who try to stop the project?"

    "What do you think happened to the rest of our staff?"

    "Ah."
    ///
    "Boss?"

    "Yes?"

    "You still didn't change the font yet."

    "Ugh, fine, only doing this because you're the only staff member left."

    [​IMG]
    "Better?"

    "Better."


    "Boss?"

    "Yes, Intern?"

    "Why do you think Frank came to the Chucklefish Clash?"

    "He didn't come to us, we came to it."

    "What? Why?"

    "To stop him, well, more like satisfy him so he stops trying to kill us all."

    "What?"

    "This whole thing is an elaborate sacrifice so he leaves us alone."

    "Ah,"

    "..."

    "Why's he showing up now though?"

    "He was always here, right from the beginning. The holes in space-time, the random theme changes, the impossible life forms. All his doing-"

    Boss looks at his watch and notices it's 10 o'clock.

    "Her doing I mean."

    "Yeah but like, why is he-"

    "She."

    "She being so... physical now?"

    "Because she's bored."

    Boss waves a lazy hand at one of the many monitors, showing the last 3 contestants.

    [​IMG]
    "She remains quiet if given souls and strife and right now she's getting neither."

    "Why doesn't she just like, kill us all? Why accept getting a small meal every year instead of getting a banquet whenever she wants?"

    "Because B̬̘͓ͤ̐͝ḛ̱̠̻̞͌̑c̯̰̱̝͔̱̻̊̒ͭ̅̇̃̽͜ạ̸̧͈̯̰͌̔͋ͪ̚ǔ͉͓̱͕ͨ̎̓̿ͯͪͨ́͝s̼͎̥ͯ̏̿͘̕e̵̮̝͉̤͎̽̓̀͘͝ ̘̞̰̓ͣ͒̔ͪͣ̚b̸̡̛͎̪̻̝͉̻̟̉ͣ͛̈̊̍͂͊l̘̱̝͌̿ͩ̎̅̈́ͬ̿͟͢õ̮͍̏̔̅̑͠o̷̬̝͇̘̔ͧd̶̲͇͙̻̻͈̺̰ͣ̐ ̥͑́̈͡ọ̮̼͍̠ͤ̇ͩ͟͞f̳̦̼̖̜͖͎̳̗̀ͩͭͩ̎̌̃̈́ ̪͎͚̳̬̟̔̌̐̏͜s͓̮͕̼̺̟͉̦ͯ́a̸̡̼͙̳͍̼̘̍͢c̟̤̫͖̹̞̭̆ͫ̿̇ͣ̃ͪͩ͟r̛ͩͪ̌̍҉̗͔̫̟̞ͅa̢̝̞͍̼̺̜͉͈͖͛f̷̴͖͉̗̂ͤͤ̓ͮ͊̅ỉ̢͇̭̩͇̘͉̭̝̱çͪͣ̓̊̍ͥ́ͫ̈́҉̬͕̺̥̲̺̗͉e̝̞̜̱͓̔͛̂̆ ͚̘̠̓̆͑̀ͮ͜͞͠i̸̯̠̠̭̘̳̲̫̊̀͊͗̾̉̓s̘͚̭͈͇͙̏̎͑̆̐̿̇ ̢̲͚̦̗͗ͬ̊̎̔ͯ̈̏́͠s͕͙̹͉̯̠̠̟̱̒̂̅͌̔ͮ̃͟͜ẇ̸̸̦̦̦̩̝̜ͯ͒̓e̢ͯ̋ͮͩͧͮ͏̗̦̟̳e̬̗̻̯͉̻̯̐͂ͨͩ͋͘t̴̡̯͈͉̣̘͊͝ȩ̧͈̪̯̮̥͔̤̤̞̒ͨ͂r͈͓͙̠̼͋̂͢͝ ̧͇̤̻͍̜̪ͦ͋̀ͥ͗̈ť̵̶̟̗̳͓́ͩ̑̿̑ͪ̒h̨̹̬̟̞̲̠͊͋̂ͩ̂ͬ̊̍͠ą̵͋̅͆ͅn̢͙̉ͤ͐͗͑͠ ̦͕̲̭̀̏͂ͦ̏͟͢b̨͚͎̀͂ļ̮̜̰̬̮ͥͤ̂ͯö̶̡͎̥͕̠̫̤o̧̼̮͓̣̼̹̪ͦ̅̒ͦ͆̅d̖̼͈͔̐̒̑̅̊ͥ̓̿͞ ̌̈ͯ̈̈ͥ̅҉͔͕̥̪̦̺̻o̧͉͔̝̠͈̲̲ͩͬͫ̒f̥̃̏́͟͝ ͚̳͍̐̒̾ͪ͡m̭͓͎̺̮͍̎͂ͩͪͫ͗ǘ̴̢̝̤̗̘͌͌́̒̑̔ͥ͟r͙̻̹̮͆ͣ͆̃̉ͮ͊d̄̀ͫ̓ͯ̄҉̳͕̬e̡͍̩͚̝͔͑̋͒͡r͉͔̱̟̯̠̟ͭ́̋ͬ͗̎ͤ͊͜"

    "What?"

    "What?"

    "What did you say?"

    "Nothing."

    "What was that then?"

    "It was Frank, she doesn't have a mouth and so uses others."

    "Ah."

    "Yeah..."

    "We should probably kill the rest of them off before Frank grows more impatient."

    "Yeah."
    [​IMG]
    His body was found, drained of its blood. Organs and limbs twisted and contorted in unnatural shapes, and a mile from his deathbed (more like death floor) was a clay figure of him embedded with pins.
    "Boss?" Intern asked, sweaty-faced and eyes bulging as he dug another hole, panting from the effort but managing to keep his voice even and clear.

    "Yes?" Boss replied, idly toying with another clay figure as he watched Intern work in one hand while texting the bidders in another.

    "I think I might quit after this."

    "No one leaves."

    "OK."

    ///

    Aaaaand end! I hope you guys enjoyed this experimental post! And hint hint: might turn this into another forum game soon ;0. Mushroom and Frozen remain, who do you think will win?
     
  10. Jake9039

    Jake9039 Pangalactic Porcupine

    freeze the mushrooms!
     
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  11. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    Mushroom the freeze!
     
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  12. The Purple Dragon

    The Purple Dragon Master Astronaut

    It's okay, I'll walk it off. Nice plot by the way, and curtains, the curtains are nice too.
     
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  13. Pangaea

    Pangaea Forum Moderator

    Unless it's rigged frozen water will win.
     
    The Purple Dragon likes this.
  14. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    [​IMG]
    My my, aren't you so sure. This is Chucklefish! Anything can happen!
     
    The Purple Dragon likes this.
  15. Witch Cat

    Witch Cat Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    [​IMG]
    "Hello- Hello?" Boss' voice boomed throughout the now mostly empty arena along with the squeal of ear-piercing feedback, "Is this thing on right?- Yes hello, contestants! Yes, contestants, still more than one of you left. For now anyway. Because there's only two of you left!" Boss explained. Frozen and Mushroom -- both on other sides of the arena -- looked up blanky at the air, looking for where his disembodied came from. "So," Boss' voice began, "I need one of you to like, hurry up and kill the other. No suicide pacts or random friendships, ok? That's against the rules. Alright, good luck!"

    The com switched off and Boss swivelled in his chair, sighing deeply as Intern gazed passively at him. "You did well, Boss!" he said suddenly. Boss didn't reply.

    Intern went back to staring at the multitude of screens, internally groaning as he resumed to staring at nothing. Nothing seemed to move. All still and frozen, whether the world was this boring right now or if Frank had frozen time in a fit of boredom Intern was unable to tell. What felt like hours passed, Intern was ready to fall asleep at the desk until a flicker of movement in the corner of one of the screens snapped him awake.

    "Boss! Boss! I think they're gonna actually kill each other!"

    Boss snorted awake, wiping his eyes as he rolled over in his chair, "What? Let me see," he demanded as he pushed Intern aside, staring wide-eyed at the screen, "Huh, no call for friendship or anything, just straight to death. Very unexpected, alright Intern, you know what to do."

    Intern nodded and got out of his seat. Now, where did he put that bat?

    A few miles away in the middle of a grassy expanse, stood The Mushroom Lord, staring defiantly off into the distance as Frozen Water sauntered up the hill. "あなた、きのこの王よ!私たちはこの愚かなゲームを終わらせる時です、私と戦いなさい!" he hissed, his voice like the cracking of ice. The Mushroom Lord tilted his head, confused as the mushrooms that circled around his feet began to let out a series of coded farts, "toot toooot toooot toot toot toot toot toot toooot toooot toot toot toooot toooot toot toot" they said.

    Frozen wasted no time and painfully tore out the ice tray he attached to himself to attract people on his favourite dating up Glacir and flung it towards Mushroom. The deadly sharp edges of the tray flying through the air with the speed and precision of an arrow but Mushroom has quickly brought his arms up, conjuring forth a wall of mushrooms in front of him, letting the tray safely embed itself into it. Frozen forced to face his flabby form fell into a frenzy of fury that froze him, giving Mushroom ample time to formulate an attack of his own. Digging his arms deep into the ground, he caused a volley of sharpened vines to sprout underneath Frozen and twist and wrap around him even though mushrooms don't sprout from vines.

    Mushroom quickly advanced on Frozen, a poisonous mushroom in one hand as he approached Frozen, a sly grin playing on his face. "Admit defeat!" Mushroom commanded in regular English because the authour was too lazy to write mushroom-fart morse code again.

    Frozen spat on his feet, a chilling smile forming on his cold expression as he raised his head and stared deep into Mushroom's eyes.
    "お前はもう死んでいる"

    "toot toooot toooot toot toot toot toot toot toooot toooot toot toot toooot toooot toot toot"

    One ear-bleeding shriek later and Mushroom was quickly covered in ice. Caked in frosting. A not-so-living-living-statue. The vines that held Frozen gently fell away. Fireworks began shinning in the sky.

    FROZEN WATER IS THE VICTOR!

    Frozen raised his arms to the sky, closing his eyes. He could almost feel his freedom and victory swirling around him and-

    WHACK!

    With one well-placed blow, Intern had cleaved the skull of Frozen Water.

    NO ONE IS THE VICTOR!
    Frozen's body dropped to the ground with an unceremonious thump. Warm water leaked from the wound as Intern sat down next to the slowly melting dead body. He dropped his head to his knees, sharply inhaling as he drank in the tense air. The distant explosions of the fireworks now only a distant buzz in his ear.

    "You did good, Intern."

    He looked up and saw Boss beaming down on him, his smile odd yet genuine as he texted with impressive speed without even looking at the phone.

    "What- what happens now?" Intern asked, his voice dry and raw. Was it wrong to think about drinking Frozen?

    "What do you mean?"

    "Like, what happens now? The bidders, the portal, the bodies, everything. Whu- Whu-"

    "Hush hush," Boss forcefully interjected, "It'll all be taken care of. We get the winners money because they all betted on Frozen winning, not you. The suckers. We use the money for hiring body clean up and also to fund our next murder game! We better hurry up, only got a week before we have to throw in more bodies," he mumbled as he looked over to Portal, its yawning, gaping entrance showing pure nothingness. No blackness or whiteness or fuzz or noise, just pure nothing.

    "A- a week? I thought we had like, months before having to worry about the next one!"

    "Nah, terms updated. Portal wants more lives now."

    "How are we going to get the bodies? The new arena? Jesus Boss there's like a million different things we have the pay for, the money of 4 bidders isn't going to fund all that in a week!"

    "Relax Intern, we'll go for the cheap solution now. We'll just have people murder each other for fun!"

    "That is not going to work."

    "Never underestimate the public's lust for blood."
     
  16. Jake9039

    Jake9039 Pangalactic Porcupine

    Oh, I can nominate now? Or only marinate. Either way, I'm going to nate a thing now. It's steak.
     
    The Purple Dragon likes this.
  17. The Purple Dragon

    The Purple Dragon Master Astronaut

    In the back of my mind I saw it coming.
     
  18. Pangaea

    Pangaea Forum Moderator

    What did I say? Absolutely rigged.
     
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  19. The Purple Dragon

    The Purple Dragon Master Astronaut

    My arch nemesis almost triumphed. But truly, maple was the greatest foe.
     
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  20. Daikon Ocelot

    Daikon Ocelot Spaceman Spiff

    I don't understand. What is this game all about?
     

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