Chat Tell Us Your Troubles Thread - advice & friendly chats

I just feel, nervous, angry, depressed...

 

Any reason in particular for those feelings? Need to vent those frustrations?

 

It builds up really fast...

I used to vent by destroying starbound planets (i have my own server so I would make sure I didn't crash it) but even venting that amount of rage by scorching the surface doesn't last long.

 

Games are a great way to unwind. Like I used to reply to my parents who disapproved of my gaming habits: HEY! Would you rather I went outside to smoke pot or beat up hobos to blow off some steam, or staying at the safety of this home ripping Skorpion's spine out?

 

Well last night I had a nasty mental break, depression, followed the next day by almost murderous anger and rage...

I thought I was getting better, but I got much worse I think...

>_<

I'm starting to question many parts of my life...

 

I'm sorry to hear it. Did you get hurt?
If you are getting such strong urges to become violent and lash out at anything nearby, then you need to do something about it. For your own sake and those who are closer to you.
I'd suggest you see a psychologist, for this thread only goes so far in helping others deal with those issues. But you have my best wishes for a swift recovery.

 

They can't help me, it just doesn't work, nothing gets done when they're interested in the money.

I just can't speak out to any of them, my hovering parents always butt in and I can't... be honest because of how nosy they get.

Don't push me away so soon, this place may very well be the end of the line, for better or worse.

I need friends, peers who genuinely care and understand, not some book toting, overpaid counselor.

 

It's not like I'm pushing you away. I'll read your posts here whenever, don't worry.
Also, visiting a shrink is something to be done by yourself. You have every right to your privacy in those instances, and they did make a vow of confidentiality, so your parents won't be able to get anything out of him if you don't want to.
Sadly, yes, money talks. But it's your mental health we are talking about here. I am hesitant to think your parents wouldn't be willing to shell out money if it means you'll get proper treatment.[DOUBLEPOST=1422305852][/DOUBLEPOST]The point I was trying to make is: Our ability to help is somewhat limited here. Of course, what I can do to assuage your situation, I will. Rest assured of that. So make a post here whenever you feel like talking about it.

 

They stain it by pressuring me to get them involved when I can't for reasons I find hard to explain.

I will say one thing though, hanging out around the furry clans here, especially W.O.O.F. has been beneficial, they're all incredibly nice and friendly people, the way they support eachother and others is a VERY effective weapon against depression, but maybe any clan will work.

If I've learned one thing about depression, it's this, "Don't fight it alone"

 

Lest you be in severe financial need, I verry much doubt your parents would be with any intention to deny you of mental recovery.

Pressuring you to get them involved in your mental recovery?Apologies, but your parents, pressuring you, to be able to accompany you in your recovery doesn't seem in the least, a bad idea.

And whilst personally, I just dont get furries, its nice to see you are having fun and slowly curing up yer depression.

As someone who got really bad, to the point of every night worshiping the Dark Lord, to gamble my soul for a quick death, I do hope you never go so deep into depression.

Also, how bad is it?Are you on medication and therapy?Everything going alright?

We arent gonna replace that, but hey, if ya ever need a listening ear, Im available, and many others aswell.

 

Life can be played single-player, but multiplayer is the best.

Most people in life are simply looking for somewhere they fit in, a group of people that support them and cheer them on or pick them up. It absolutely sucks when your parents cannot be part of that group, but it seems like you realize that and are acting accordingly. (trying to include people in your group when they aren't supportive or helpful generally does not work out well for you or for them).

It sounds like your parents are very invested in the results you produce (grades, school, projects, blah blah) and aren't very invested in the person you are or the things you're interested in. If that's the case, that's really, really hard to deal with. Mostly because you are a person and not a set of results or a machine that produces results, but also because your parents were likely raised that way themselves and they don't know any other way to "evaluate" people.

 

They worry too much to the point they pressure me and take me so far out my comfort zone I get panic attacks.

 

Honestly, wat.

They genuinely care to that point, so that's already kickass, and I cant quite tell if pushing your boundries is either a good thing or a bad thing, seeing as I really dont know you, or anything about you.

For all I know, you could be a classical Aspergers, and hate all kinds of change, never leaving your comfort zone.Or you could be the most chill bro I have ever seen, and never get pissed off.

And talking about your stuff never hurts, it only helps the worse get lighter.

 

It's very spotty.

Sometimes they want to know everything...

What I didn't say is that they don't understand, or care much to, they recently have become convinced that it's all my doing, and punish me for my depressive symptoms.

It's like they do want to help, but not enough to figure out how to not make it worse.

 

Have you tried to explain this to them?
Such assumptions are often the result of miscommunication.
If you try to keep them from it with such vehemence, they are bound to make their own assumptions.
And having a doctor nearby to talk sense into them would help too.

 

Apologies if I sound rude, but, for once, Ill become my true self and just be direct.

For the love of a Daemonette and a Ork making out, why don't you just f*cking confront them, tell em to quite being shitheads, and fucking quite being a bunch of misguided idiots, and to properly help ya out?

Intentions are nice, execution is shit, tell em to leave the personal details out, and to quite fucking thinking you somehow depressed yourself on purpose, or whatever kind of bullshit they might have concocted.

Fucking talk to them, and straighten it out.Don't have the courage?Deal with it.

Confrontation is necessary in life, and you don't, in any way, harm yourself by doing what I have said.

 

I think there's a difference between being direct and being rude, heh. It's really easy to tell someone to shove off, but it's a lot harder to do that when it's you in front of your parents. Especially if you live with them and depend on them for food/shelter. Parents don't magically change immediately when you tell them that you want to be treated differently, especially if they're still in the mindset that they need to help guide you through life. You know, the way they did when you were really tiny.

It sounds like Marxon's parents don't understand what he's going through, but are insisting that they can help. Unfortunately, I don't think that their attempts to help are actually helping the situation. Most times, when someone doesn't understand a situation, they try to think of experiences they've had that could be similar, and offer advice / take action based on that. Here, it doesn't sound like the parents have similar experiences, so we reach a point where they want to help (but can't) and Marxon wants to get help (but can't).

Doing the same things will lead to the same result (frustration for everyone), so you gotta find a way to change things up. Tell them that you would really like to try seeing a counselor or doctor alone first, and then if it goes well you can consider inviting them to join in. Parents want to be part of your life, and unfortunately step on toes a lot to do so. At the same time, there is a point in life when they must accept that your life is separate, and it's YOUR life, not their life. Maybe this is that point in time, where they need to start stepping back and letting you walk on your own?

 

My father as old as he is, is a near stereotypical Irishman, takes offense to a lot of things he considers back talk, (we both have rage issues) and one of the few things he remembers with perfect clarity is his martial arts training. Oh and he tries to control me with physical intimidation and verbal abuse (never been the same since he was involved in a speeding hit and run, with him on a bike)

Basically he's a very sour and aggressive old man itching to take out the endless frustration from the chronic pain. So if he does get involved (he WILL butt in) and things get physical, someone will very likely get hurt, badly.

I just let the poor old man live in peace, and try to do what he asks and stay out of his way.

I've said plenty on that subject so I'll also just say this. I have my own anger issues and I've lost friends to it, and done absolutely horrible things like... vent my anger physically, on my beloved dog. Usually after its over I'm left with depression and regret from the awful, evil things I say and do. I'm normally a very docile guy who strives to be likable, so when my mind is flooded with violent, often sadistic, and occasionally murderous thoughts that scream at me to be acted out... It takes a severe toll on my sanity.

I now isolate myself from anyone or anything when the rage builds, because the last thing I want is to do something so awful I won't be able to forgive myself for it...



There...

 

On the first part, my severe social awkwardness and general inability to properly perceive or express proper tone is the main reason I have next to zero offline friends left, and have severe issues communicating with my rather headstrong parents...

The rest, yeah I am in agreement.

 

well, your father is almost the same as mine, except that he'll try to manipulate me by pulling my heartstrings, appealing to his frailty whenever I tried to confront him with anything. It was one of the biggest reasons that saw me out of there.