Complete Starbound Writing Contest - December 2015

Discussion in 'Community Contests/Giveaways' started by Zebe, Dec 2, 2015.


Vote for the winning story.

Poll closed Jan 9, 2016.
  1. "A psychopath's peace" by Lavranzo

    10 vote(s)
  2. "Contest Entry" by Warget

    2 vote(s)
  3. "Interstellar Joyride" by Sir Wilfrey

    3 vote(s)
  4. "In the Dead of Winter" by The Squid

    0 vote(s)
  5. "Terra" by petethepug

    1 vote(s)
  6. "The Erchius Experiment" by AliasPseudonym

    9 vote(s)
  7. "The VEP Logs" by Tatterdemalion

    9 vote(s)
  8. "The Wonderful Planet" by Mister Pixel

    9 vote(s)
  1. AliasPseudonym

    AliasPseudonym Big Damn Hero

    Down here in Australia it's Summer, and I still didn't feel like a happy ending.
    Zebe, Tatterdemalion and Alkanthe like this.
  2. Tatterdemalion

    Tatterdemalion Phantasmal Quasar

    My apologies, I didn't account for the Aussies in the thread! (Or anyone in the southern hemisphere, actually)
    Good to see that everybody's equally cantankerous everywhere right now!
    Lavranzo, Zebe and Alkanthe like this.
  3. CondescendedWow

    CondescendedWow Supernova

    GAH am I too late to submit?
    I just did my story summary/created the thread now, sorryyyyy.
    If I can still submit it, the link is: THIS

    If not then hey, shameless advertising.[DOUBLEPOST=1451739147][/DOUBLEPOST]*Reads due date*
  4. Lavranzo

    Lavranzo Pangalactic Porcupine

    Pheewey, this is a close one :eek: Really should've spent some more time on it I see :nuruninja:
    Zebe and Mister Pixel like this.
  5. Mister Pixel

    Mister Pixel Big Damn Hero

    I'd say you've got nothing to worry about. Such a great story deserves the 1st place, no doubt.
    Lavranzo and Zebe like this.
  6. Lavranzo

    Lavranzo Pangalactic Porcupine

    Thanks a lot. You have no idea what it means to me, being flattered with such nice words. Truly, a first place would not be half the worth of your flattery!
    Mister Pixel likes this.
  7. Mister Pixel

    Mister Pixel Big Damn Hero

    The contest is over? Isn't it going till the 9th of January?
    Lavranzo, Zebe and Alkanthe like this.
  8. Zebe

    Zebe Space Kumquat

    this is what I get for having two contests right next to each other
    This ain't over yet, no. Just a mistake, and now the title is fixed.
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2016
    Lavranzo and Alkanthe like this.
  9. Alkanthe

    Alkanthe Supernova

    *puts foxes on the title*
    Zebe likes this.
  10. Zebe

    Zebe Space Kumquat

    well wasnt that just a total floof up
    Alkanthe likes this.
  11. Alkanthe

    Alkanthe Supernova

    Zebe likes this.
  12. lornlynx

    lornlynx Cosmic Narwhal

    Sweet, I enjoyed reading all of them and have cast my vote. /evil laughter

    I will write a short, personal opinion about every single one now. Bear in mind that my opinion is highly subjective, as I greatly value fanfiction that builds upon the original lore and/ore expands it.
    Also I'm a really picky reader and don't be angry if I don't like your story, as I am just a human and as so there are certain things that I personally just enjoy reading more than others.

    "A psychopath's peace" by Lavranzo
    Very entertaining story. Although the ending was to be expected I liked the basic idea of it and how it was executed. What I didn't like was how it didn't bind strongly to the lore as you could have replaced the character and universe with anyone and anything and not change a bit, and that after hearing the fifth time how few things mattered the term becoming quite dull.

    "Contest Entry" by Warget
    Enjoyable, it was nice to read of descriptions how Novakids may communicate and express feelings, and the general story being told like a distant memory. Could have used some more structure maybe and it left me a bit disappointed not getting a conclusion about what happened ultimately with the father.

    Interstellar Joyride by @Sir Wilfrey

    Probably just not suited for a shortstory contest as it left a lot to be desired, considering there is no character development, no real story progression and definitely no end. Though I have to say I greatly enjoyed the way the Novakid talked and voiced his thoughts!

    In the Dead of Winter by @The Squid
    Couldn't really find myself at peace with this one. As said, I enjoy lore-true pieces that expand on the universe and while I get the idea of the Grinch-story in Starbound, I personally just don't find it particularly interesting. Characters could be replaced mostly with any other being and nothing would change.

    Terra by @petethepug
    This was the hardest to read, as I am still unsure if the grammar mistakes were wanted or just indicating the author's inexperience. Guessing on the latter (forgive me if that's not the case) I would say the writer is still young and still has a lot to learn. The whole story felt like one long excerpt of random thoughts that entered it's creators mind without any cohesion or clear path. Though I rate this the weakest story, please do not be discouraged from my harsh opinion. The ideas are there as well as the motivation, and in such a case the best one can do is keep writing writing and writing, the rest comes by itself.

    The Erchius Experiment by @AliasPseudonym
    I loved this one, as it not only delved really deep into the mindset of a species daily life struggles and the general structure of its civilisation, but the character also had a lot of doubts and the story let one really feel with him. Also the ending was great to read. A very well built story which fits all of my lore-concerning needs and would still be a great piece on its own.

    The VEP Logs by @Tatterdemalion
    My second runner on the list. The log format was something new but still quite enjoyable to read, and the main character also had an interesting personality that one would instantly associate with its species. I could see this story being implemented as-is into the game, maybe strewn over an abandoned Apex facility?

    The Wonderful Planet by @Mister Pixel
    Also a quite interesting format and idea, this one seemed to nudge on the (hopefully) upcoming terraforming system? I don't have a lot to add here, considering the story was all around enjoyable, albeit its format. The humor at the end was lost on me I have to say though...

    And I vote for: The Erchius Experiment by @AliasPseudonym

    Will probably check again after contest is over (probably shouldn't allow people to vote before it is over, lol).
    petethepug, Sir Wilfrey, Zebe and 6 others like this.
  13. AliasPseudonym

    AliasPseudonym Big Damn Hero

    Thanks for the review! I also have a continuous fan-fiction called "Sound Bedlam'. Shameless self-advertising!
    Anyway, I'm pretty sure the contest IS actually over but the voting isn't. I've seen previous comments on the subject as well. Just to clarify- the contest ended on the 31st of December and voting ends on the 9th of January. At least I think so.
    Zebe, Alkanthe, lornlynx and 2 others like this.
  14. The Squid

    The Squid Oxygen Tank

    In my opinion, your review was incredibly accurate. Looking back, this was probably one of my worst fan fics. Not my worst, but its up there. Anyway, I don't spend that much time on it, which is probably one reason. I wanted to submit something, but school and a bunch of other stuff took up most of my time. I didn't know who to use as a character, so I pulled on from another Starbound fan fic I'm writing (yes, I know the laziness is horrifying). But I typed up a page early on in December and then on the 30th I deleted it all and started over, using the same characters and plot. Another mistake was doing a holiday theme, because now the holidays are over as opposed to when I was writing.
    Anyway. I just realized I've been ranting for like the past five !minutes about everything that I did wrong so I'm gonna go now. @lornlynx thanks for the feedback! :DD
    Zebe, Alkanthe and lornlynx like this.
  15. Lavranzo

    Lavranzo Pangalactic Porcupine

    Haha, very true. I'd have to agree with the part about how unlore-ly, it is - to be fair, I'm not very keen on Starbound lore, and found that just making it connect in theme (other planets, futuristic societies, etc), was enough for me to think of it as Starbound fanfiction: For truly, Starbound is just about that - enourmous universe; little restraint when it comes to lore = endless possibilities. Also, perhaps the interesting part about the story, which also reflects the theme itself, was exactly the fact that the character could have been anyone (I even believe I made him nameless, right?) and that the universe could be anything: The motif, the plot, the theme; they are all, in my opinion, universal - I believe that I spare the readers of having to applying themes of a nonexistant universe and fictional character; instead choosing to do an archetype, and through that, speed up the self-reflection process.
    But yea, I'll take that piece of critique to heart; as you said, this is a starbound-fanfiction :p

    Your other part, about repetition, I'd have to tastefully disagree with you upon, however. I do believe that, while maybe an all-too-common phenomena, repetition does serve its purpose, and while I might have either spiced it up a bit by changing either the format, the words or the sentence structure, or even by removing it entirely, it would have taken away a good chunk of the story: The empty, almost thoughtless, discard of emotions or care. The sentences/repetitions themselves (the monotonous "it doesn't matter") are in the way they are worded a description of themselves, reflecting the psychological barrier, that sentenced the main character to his own death and/or redemption (depending on how you interpret the story, 'cause you know, fiction is fiction, and to some extent, any interpretation could be valid). The barrier is cold, boring, simply put: not worth of care.

    Okay... that came of a bit on the rambly side... I might return and do some edits. Oh, and though it might seem like I disliked your review: I didn't - quite the opposite in fact! Thanks a lot :)[DOUBLEPOST=1452096999][/DOUBLEPOST]Also, sorry if my english is a bit faulty - its not my mother tongue and long passages tend to explode in words and sentences that arent coherent ;)
    Mister Pixel, The Squid, Zebe and 3 others like this.
  16. Zebe

    Zebe Space Kumquat

    A neat summary of opinions :up:

    Also, just confirming again that the contest is over for the part of submitting works. Currently, it's the voting phase, which will end on 9th January (or whatever time it says for you under the poll title).
    Lavranzo, lornlynx and Alkanthe like this.
  17. Sir Wilfrey

    Sir Wilfrey Spaceman Spiff

    Yes, Yes, Yes, and yes. All of this is true, it was more a scramble from me to finally contribute something to the Forum's writing community, and it is VERY much meant to be continued and further elaborated. Short story contest isn't a good place to put it, but I really wanted to jump the gun and finally add something. I have a particularly Lore-Expanding piece you can check out, a secret project of mine I'm taking more seriously and adding to more regularly, if you'd like I can send you a fairly revised/edited draft of the prologue, it sounds like your kind of deal. I appreciate the criticism, no matter what kind it is, it's feedback and it's useful!
    Mister Pixel, Zebe, Lavranzo and 2 others like this.
  18. Mister Pixel

    Mister Pixel Big Damn Hero

    Wow, haha, the stakes are high on this one. Please, people, stop voting for my story or else we'll have four entries with 9 votes each. D:

    Edit: God damn it.
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2016
    Zebe and Lavranzo like this.
  19. Alkanthe

    Alkanthe Supernova

    Don't tell them to stop voting for your story! It was great!
  20. Lavranzo

    Lavranzo Pangalactic Porcupine

    It sure was!
    Also @Zebe What happens if more than one contestant end on the same amount of votes, making both of them eligible for either the first, second or third place?
    Zebe, Mister Pixel and Alkanthe like this.

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