Otter Tech

Discussion in 'Corporations Archive' started by southernarmy86, May 6, 2013.

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Would you join the glorious ranks of Otter Inc?

  1. Where do i sign??

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. How about no!

    2 vote(s)
    50.0%
  3. otter otter otter otter

    3 vote(s)
    75.0%
  1. southernarmy86

    southernarmy86 Space Spelunker

    Here at Otter Tech we pride ourselves in being second to none Seal Tech. They are our business partners enemies while we construct bunkers and renovate old soviet war bunkers they poke animals.

    History

    Get the boring stuff out of the way first! Well we started out as a small call center on planet Undio after increasing profits enough we bought a small concrete business and doubled it size to make enough concrete per day to make a entire planet. After we got done swimming in cash we found out recent happenings in the warm war people needed/ wanted bunkers to feel safe so we started to help them with that. It wasn't profitable at first but we wanted to help (help ourselves) make people feel safe and it was enough. That is until a googlplexian (that means hes incredibly rich) decided he wanted to turn a entire planet into a bunker it was difficult many died but that's what makes our company very strong today. After Numerous lawsuits about "Worker safety, and hazardous conditions" we decided to buy out all the judges which wasn't cheap. Finally we started to wait for another chance to redeem ourselves after the warm war ended we ran out of business where we have been lying dormant for many years just waiting.
    Ethics
    we do NOT harm any animals.....unless they try to harm us..

    Jobs
    Tester
    We have to know if our bunkers can survive a nuclear blast. And if the people inside can survive to!
    Pay 15 per hour if you survive 2000 per bunker test

    Builder
    Well we have to have the bunkers built and renovated right?
    Pay if you survive building the bunker 5000

    Manufacturer
    We need nukes dont we?
    Pay if you're not captured 10K per nuke

    Spy
    We have to stay ahead of our competition dont we?
    Pay if you survive 1K per file

    Poker
    We have to annoy our competition into submission
    pay 10.00 per poke

    Phone technician
    Not only do you fix the phones but you also have to answer the phones you fix. because there's a lot of angry people who want their money out there.
    Job $50 per phone call and fix

    Henchman
    You take care of the wise guys see? If my employees get unruly you are my first guy i call
    Payment 150 per "vacation"

    Scientist
    We need newer and better building materials! i hear that uranium is a good material this month
    Payment 25 per hour

    If you have a accident on the work site we regret to inform you that your money will NOT be sent to your relatives.
    waiting!
     
  2. gamerseal

    gamerseal Subatomic Cosmonaut

    I declare corporate war on you!
     
  3. southernarmy86

    southernarmy86 Space Spelunker

    I will survive this do not worry i make your bunkers and little did you know we put nukes in the walls .
    Thats why there are radiation signs and why your employees have grown a third arm
    i have prepared for this moment my good man and we will survive
     
  4. gamerseal

    gamerseal Subatomic Cosmonaut

    I just assumed they were working so hard that they needed another arm.
     
  5. southernarmy86

    southernarmy86 Space Spelunker

    no that would be the radiation
     
  6. Percival

    Percival Phantasmal Quasar

    Otter otter otter otter otter otter otter otter otter. Otters are fuckin awesome. Go otters!
     
  7. Opirian

    Opirian Subatomic Cosmonaut

    ((Please provide a clearly defined code of ethics and more defining information such as history))
     

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