I would rather not reveal my true identity. The two masks that are Hi-Voltage and Fire Hazard will both stay on, as I am trying to hide myself from the wary eye of the Internet Beast. I will now speak of my gaming preferences, as is common in my culture of warning sign-people. I prefer construction and survival games to that of shooters and 'modernized' capture-the-flags. 'Cheating' for aesthetic purposes does not matter to me. I will do it, as is inevitable, but when I do I will not claim legitimacy in any form afterwards. I will not be frequent in these lands. The Internet Beast is said to prowl the open plains of forums commonly. I oft play singleplayer, as when in multiplayer servers of the games I do play they tend to crash. I clearly have bad tastes. I never finish my construction projects on the first go. I currently have multiple in Starbound, one for each race (at least) and I focus mainly on the Hylotl underseas city. That is all about me that the Internet Beast is privileged to know. I must hurry now before it comes to find me.
You should hire a monster hunter of some sort, you shouldn't have to spend most of your life running from the Internet Beast, the best option is to KILL IT! PETA please don't hurt me Welcome aboard!
Hello and Welcome dood! The Internet Beast is really scary , it once absorbed all my wifi connection to power up itself dood!
I've been concocting a scheme on my travels in the opposite direction of the Internet Beast. I have reason to believe the only weak spot is it's rear end, where its plethora of watchful eyes cannot see. But killing it using brute force would be nigh impossible without armor blessed by the gods of the Inter-realms.
I hear that the Internet Beast can be blinded by a rare plant which can only be found near the ancient would-be northern Inter Realm portal, while the portal was never proved to have been opened, the plant found nearby would certainly be a true replacement for the blessed armor. You must head north of the portal, and there you shall find a cave. The plant which the Internet Beast's plethora of eyes cannot stand the sight of shall be found there. Good luck!
PETA probably wouldn't care mate, they are hypocritical lel. Anyways, welcome uh..attempting to recall your name..Fire Hazard....no, no..ah Hi Voltage. Heh, heh fire hazard
Shh! Don't lure it here, else I'll be on the run once more! I do recall the mythical portal. However, what if I were to grind the plant into a powder with the mixture consisting of sand and other harsh grains? Perhaps I would be able to blind it, long enough to rid it of its mystical abilities.
That hasn't bee tested, all I know is that according to the legend the Internet Beast's eyes are sensitive to the sight of the plant due to it being considered holy, and a vile creature such as the Internet Beast wouldn't stand the sight of a holy object. There's no way of knowing a powdered version would still affect the beast, certainly not as long as the plant would affect it in it's natural state.
But instead of simply making it revolt at the sight of the plant, perhaps it can be scattered on its face -- like pocket sand. I'll keep a pocketful of both the whole plant and mixture and the next time I encounter the Beast I'll see what happens. If it doesn't work out, I'll have to keep searching for something to permanently defeat the Internet Beast, possibly removing it's corporeal form and sending it back to the Deep Web. Edit: By the way, nice Argonian, Featherdust. I do prefer them to the Orcs and Elves and Humans, definitely.
