Floran Cooking

How would you like it if i ate you?!

 

You could try!

 

Food can't eat Floran. It'd be like water drinking a glasssss.

 

thats all too violent for me anyway...

 

Angry. different people have different definitions of "doing nothing wrong"
Racist. In my book "existing" is enough grounds for extermination, but only for avians

 

Oh good god I'm going to become a hypocrite so bloody fast buuut... galactic genocide? That needs an expansion.... very possibly to Florans and Glitch. Let the crusade begin.

 

I find the Hylotl to be pompous, so even as a human, I would turn the other way if Florans ate Hylotl in my presence. I'd actively bring Floran more Hylotl if it meant they'd leave me alone, though.

Florans and Glitch are the ones I feel most at home among, and I feel indifferent towards other humans and the Apex. Want to eat Avians, Hylotl, or anyone else, though? Feel free.

 

Hey guys what's going on her-

oh

 

Shhhhhh...... quite now friend.

 

oh my... i believe we made the correct decision to hide our cities

 

I don't know about that "can't eat Floran" part, apparently leafy side salads are pretty popular with humans. Just put some dressing on there and you're set.
Now we just need to find some way to made Glitch edible.. or maybe we can just use their dead bodies as spare parts for ships and machinery and stuff.

...I'm the queen of giving people Very Bad Ideas. Keeheehee.

The only proper solution to this is to biologically engineer oneself so that your flesh simply tastes bad and can't be spiced up with cooking or seasoning. We're in the space age, we can do that.
(Or make like a squid and just just naturally evolve that way, have your bodies be reliant on salt as a key chemical while being 80% weird-tasting liquid. \ o/)

 

Floran isss working on that.

 

My two characters have to say:

"Littleman9Mew2":
Heh, I wonder what Avian tastes like. I wonder if the Florans can open up a KFC- er....KFA.
Kentucky Fried Avian.

Sylva:
I sssecond that gray-cat.

"Littleman9Mew2":
What are you calling gray-cat salad face?

Sylva:
...Floran hate gray-cat ssso much.

 

OOOhhhhh Glitch work as pots and pans!!!
Helping is great fun

 

So much textually graphic violence. I do make jokes IRL about cannibalism a lot. Although, with all the garbage humans eat, I can't imagine they taste good.

(Sergeant Calhoun voice)
I don't even eat the bugs I catch that I already have. They might make me sick. I did eat cooked poultry once. It was strangely good. I wouldn't eat anything that can talk, not even those ignorant Stargazer suicide cultists. I just point and laugh at them. Then I get out my musical instrument and start playing this old human song called "Trololo". I start playing right as their tributes hit the ground. I've been chased away with swords, spears, bows and bare fists. One time, one of them called me a coward. My magnorbs answered that one. He looked about as beat up as the tribute near him. After all the guards were incapacitated, I tagged their tower with the phrase "Kluex is a rabbit.". That'll turn some heads.

 

There was actually mild inquiry regarding this in the early 20th century! A man by the name of Seabrook convinced a hospital intern to get a bit of meat from a human corpse that had recently died. After preparing it, he remarked that it tasted very much like fine beef veal. Other similar accounts, regardless of how the meat was obtained, seem to agree that it does indeed taste like beef.
(Don't look this stuff up if you're squeamish, there's some pretty screwed up cases of cannibalism out there.)

Of course, after the whole Earth catastrophe, humans are endangered, so we might not want to eat them.
But for all the scavengers and/or various spacefarers that don't care about endangered species, well... there's the deets.


I'll probably be sticking to non-Hylotl seafood and non-Avian poultry, myself. ^ q^
Easy to farm, easy to prep, and no risk of ethics debates. Plus, it all tastes great with rice!

 

Yay! No ethics debates! I mean honestly, who would want to eat a sapient lifeform? Other than Florans, because Florans are... odd. I mean honestly nothing about this universe is normal.

 

Floran like glitch, glitch help floran a lot. Floran like human, glitch can turn the wrissssst into a good toothpick.

 

Okay! I am not going to commit galactic genocide.


Totally. I definitely WONT commit Galactic Genocide.

 

No, but we can keep cooking