Not entirely sure why I'm bothering to post. Some sense of obligation I guess. I'm so sorry to everyone that has requested on this thread. Long story short I've pretty much lost everything in my life that gave me purpose. I've lived my entire life with depression and been able to function, but now am at the point that I know nothing I do matters. I've lost all inspiration for my art, my music, my writing, everything. I'll still be around. I hope I'll eventually get back to doing something. I guess i just wanted people to know I'm not trying to ignore anyone and I wish I could get all these projects out. I merely can't work up the energy or the enthusiasm to try. Sorry.
Bummer, I read your first post first and was about to make a request as well before reading the last post. While I don't have depression, I do have a condition that limits my emotional capacity (I can't comprehend my own emotions as they feel distant to me, and I generally only feel "Amused" as my positive emotion or "Frustrated" as my negative emotion, with my default state being... well, just blank. Lust is an exception, I think it's because lust is both a physical and mental emotion, the doctor did say how easy it is for people with my problem to become addicts to those certain desires), ability to communicate (I'm nearly a mute offline, so I have to push myself to say anything and often just flat out feel like I can't respond to people at times.) and ability to be motivated (every action I take requires an act of will, except for certain exceptions- but those require an act of will NOT to take). I've been working on a project on another forum trying to work through my lack of feelings but have been failing the past few days. I may not feel motivation exactly, but I do feel stubbornness. That helps. I don't want to give in to simple feelings, or the lack there of, so I try to accomplish things despite myself. My problem may not be as bad as yours, but I hope you can get better or learn to work through it like I have been doing with my own issues. It's not easy, but things can always get better or they can always get worse. Depends on how you handle it all. I'm saying this much because I do care about the well being of others, a lot more so than my own. Perhaps it's part of my condition to care like that, but I highly doubt me- some stranger online- would be the only one to care. Perhaps you should look for someone like that, or if you have one try to let them in. Having someone who cares and having something you care about is usually very helpful to one's sanity. I hope I didn't intrude on you or anything or sound too cheesy. Like I said, I don't have depression. But I have an idea of what it's like, and know what it's like to have someone say these kinds of things to you when they don't really know what you're going through. Despite that, other people saying these things to me is why I can function at all. Otherwise I'd be an unhealthy hermit, or dead, instead of being more in the open and pushing myself to do hard things as I am to this day and will be so long as I can. Edit: Sorry it might be a little hypocritical of me to have said that, considering I didn't even want to leave bed this morning and still have tears drying on my cheeks. But in the end, here I am. Up.
I certainly hope you will get in better mood/ find ispiration in life. I really like you'r work, and I still have my request sitting on my computer Life isn't easy, but you have to find an option, to make it better ^^ You dont have to apologize. You made random internet people requests, without taking anything for it. Be proud of it, you're awesome ^^
