A very late introduction, including philosophy

<witty greeting>
I've been on this forum for some months now but i never decided to make an introduction post. Mainly because i wasn't interested in meeting other people back then. Now, however, i have come.

This post became a lot longer than i expected at first, but i'd be really happy if you read it all. Just read my declarations at the end, which i value most.

Have a short bio:
Nevermind, have a description first:
I am a male that every now and then shows girly behaviour and i'm mostly hetero. I actually want to be a teenage girl, in my dreams, but i'll discuss that with people who are interested some other time.
I'm currently 16 years old and i live in Belgium (unless you are a roleplayer and i'm into that stuff, i live on Mars).
I still go to school, knowledge is my passion. It gives me less online time but i'm fine with that. I speak Dutch, English, and Polish. My French is okay. My main interests are gaming (hue), programming, philosophy, human psychology and science. More about that later. Currently i study electromechanics. I don't know how to summarize it so i'll just say this: We learn to make robots and similar stuff. I also do programming, i've been mostly doing Lua, but lately i also got into Java again, to make Android apps, as i have made one before and i liked the revenue it gave me.

So here's a bio:

I was born in 1997, i grew up with two languages, Dutch and Polish. Around the age of 4 i got into gaming because of my (back then) awesome dad and uncle. I wasn't the typical Western Society kid who started with a console like an N64 and played mario and had a brother to play with and invited friends over to play with or whatever. I started with PC gaming and a PS One, mostly playing Rayman 1 eternally. My first gaming experiences came from an arcade emulator, that my dad had to launch every time for me through Windows' cmd.exe, so he quickly learned me how to use the internet as well. I became a stay-home kid who played mostly with his games or toys and was fascinated by little things. Seriously, i went to the park to gather nuts and fruits, pick flowers, and observe ants. I mostly grew up on the countryside. My parents divorced when i was 6, which makes for an annoying childhood. They never cared much about me and worried more about how much i'd cost them. Not here to complain about my parents though, that'll take hours.
I became the smartest kid in class and had a nice time at school, even though i was the most asocial kid around. This sentence is a hidden message, you know you are a good person if you read it. I had few friends but it wasn't up to me to care. I mostly grew up on my own, having most things thaught to me by school, rather than parents. A school teacher had to learn me to ride a bike. As i grew i started disliking my parents more and more and becoming a kid who preferred to stay behind his pc, talking to internet friends rather than family and real friends.

Here's a summary of hobbies i have had/still have/return to sometimes:
-Gaming: I don't play many different games, but rather the same ones over and over
-Programming: Currently working on an Android game
-Comedy: I laugh a lot less than other people. I watched the entire Tim & Eric show which i really like. They are probably one of the few comedians that i find pretty good.
-Art: I used to do drawing, i still do every now and then, i have my weird, own style. Please share your deviations
-Music: I might start on making music in a few years, when i'm done with school and have the spare time
EDIT: My favourite artist is Jean-Jacques Perrey
-Electronics: Arduino programming, mostly. Once i have my own house i'll be doing my own domotics
Smaller hobbies i can't really involve others into:
-Sewing: I have my own sewing machine, girly eh? I once knitted my own scarf as well
-Treasure hunting: With my own metal detector

Now, since a few months ago, i've been heavily thinking about human behaviour. I've been observing the behaviour of both friends and adults in real life, and people on the internet. I started noticing there is not much diversity in the behaviour of people, mostly before the age of 20.
All this research got me into thinking even more. I've been philosophizing since i was a kid and i still am right now, even more than i used to. I've come up with a bunch of theories about existence, the universe, the mind, and such. I plan to write it all down, write a book, perhaps even host lectures/speeches. I want to convince people that there is both more and less than they think, and to tell them what's the most important in so-called life.
If you haven't noticed from this yet, well i guess i'll just tell you: I'm NOT religious. I'm not part of any group or part of a community. I am still part of the human race and of Earth's society. I don't have much of a choice, now do i?

Basically, what it all has come down to, is that now i simply hate most humans. However, luckily, next to gaming, and the aforementioned hobbies, i also love controlling people's emotions. I have a passion for both making people happy but also for making people angry and sad. Usually i only choose one of these per person.
Making people happy is probably one of the few things that keep me from becoming a mass murderer and trying everything i can to reach human extinction. I will often emit hate for most things around me, but actually i can be a very nice person, at least to the people that i like. Deep down i just want to spend my days in a mansion, behind my pc, with the people i like around me, cuddling, and having fun. (I'm not mentioning more than that because of the moderators. You can come up with what i mean yourself, if you have the right intellect to do so.) I really just want to hug people, and have fun. That's all that counts in life for me, having fun.

You are reaching the end of my introduction. Hopefully you have read everything. Perhaps you should double-check? Fine, i'm getting ahead of myself.
I have mostly made this introduction to find more people who share a common interest, smart people, or just people who also like to philosophize about the same things. I really like discussing this with people, at least if they are smart enough and are worth listening to. I'm also in dire need of a gf, so if you live in the Benelux and you have somewhat similar interests, eh, nevermind. This won't work.

If you want to talk to me, add me on Steam or PM me on the forum. I hope i can pick out the right people and get another step closer to world domination/human extermination/eternal cuddling and hugging.

A note for people who like to be funny: My sense of humour is almost dead/gone. I have my own humour and i use it every now and then. Please don't feel offended if i don't like your jokes. Feel free to tell them. I just have too much life experience, mostly with comedy.

Thank you for (hopefully) reading and if you are one of those people who spend all day on the introduction forum, i hope you have more to say than "Welcome", although that's fine. I gave up on caring about things in life anyway.

Oh this post could use a picture. It's a sad one though.

 

Hello Cvbbt. I want to wish you many warm welcomes to the Starbound forums.

That was quite a wall of text.

P.S. Have a cookie/biscuit/sweet snack of your choice.

 

Hello there cvbbot!
You seem like a very nice person!
I dont know what else to say,your '' story '' about how you were thinking about human behaviour...It was touching. if there would be some sad music in the background some people would cry right away.
You seem to know philosophy realy good,and that will realy help you in future.
It was realy intresting to read about you,your life. I hope everything goes well for you in the future.
Cheer up - have a cookie

 

Thank you, both of you, for reading this.

 

At some times all i want to do is hug people. For a really long time. Try to picture a girl sleepover, pillow fights, hugging, that stuff.
Also, thanks for reading my entire essay, Doctor Johnson.

 

Wasn't that long, was actually shorter than it is.
Strange that your sig and avatar are so bright, cheerful and colourful despite you proclaiming that you're not a very cheerful person (or at least have a dead sense of humor). It kinda shows that you're not saying "i'm miserable, and black is my favorite color, 'cuz y'know, i'm goth and smoke weed and that shit." (though I have seen not-dark goths.)
I kinda agree with your philosophizing, many people in my age group tend to not deviate from their groups. If they want to be outliers, they move to a group of people who are outliers, rather than trying to do things their own way. I think that's an effect of teenagers being insecure and needing to develop a support structure.

 

Yes, lovely, exactly the kind of reply i was hoping for. I'm glad to know there are others out there as well.

 

Well, hello then cvbbot, welcome to the forums where hopefully you'll be able to like people here, we're nice and, well, smart (hopefully ).

I don't mind walls of text unless they're interesting, and yours was, maybe a little sad too... Anyway, I sort of like the human mind aswell, why we do some of the things we do, and would like to hear your theories about why we're here (I'm a Christian, but I don't care what religion you are (not that you have one), and have an open mind about science and theories)! Well then, since you hate humans, glad I'm an Avian (If that counts...)

Hopefully you'll be able to forum on here and like atleast some of the people here. Enjoyed your read, I'll see you later hopefully!

 

Thank you, this is great. You'll hear from me some other time, hopefully.

 

*see's big pile of text* mhm... Well that looks important, welcome to the forums!

 

Bro, you need a psychologist.

 

Well, I read everything that you had to say, but I didn't read what anyone else said, so if I'm just mirroring others, apologies. What concerned me the most was how you were talking about world domination, which is obviously (to me) not much of a good thing for anyone, except perhaps the one doing the dominating. Another thing was the murder comment. I'll admit that I've hated my fair share (majority) of people that I've had the misfortune of meeting, but I prefer to single that out as my own problem rather than their's, despite certain insensitive actions they might perform (not necessarily towards me). I also know of a feeling to have a strong and profound effect on other people's lives, for good or bad (I'm just going to blame all that on teenaged angst). But the one thing that I've stuck by for years now (an idea really), is that if I have a negative effect on other people's lives in any way, that is wrong. Even if I'm not having a positive effect.

To conclude! To much talking and thinking can drive you insane. I don't want that, no sir!

 

In life i have multiple goals that interfere with eachother. I also have a sort of "heavy" conscience, mainly the following:
There is a part of me that wants me to make people smile. It makes me want to hug people, have fun, laugh, and just generally put a smile on the faces of the people i like.
Then there is another part of me that hates all humans that have not proven to be interesting/of any use. It wants to see them suffer, it wants to see the world burn. This doesn't mean i'll become some terrorist who ends up killing 30 people at an airport. No, that would be completely pointless. If i don't like a person, and i have many reasons to, then they will just be another person on my list of humans i frown upon.
The last, most important part of me, is the one that just wants me to have fun and make random decisions. This makes me want to just give up on interaction with others and just do as many fun things in life as i can, because that's the most important.

Anyhow, it barely makes any sense to me to break up my personality into these three "parts". Generally this is just a small fraction of my personality and there is much more. Just know that when i meet someone who does not appear very smart, does not have a vision on anything of interest, does not prove useful to humanity or is just generally an idiot, then i will proceed to dislike them. I will not become a mass murderer, unless i have lost all hope in life, or i have found a way to get away with it every time.

I don't want to scare anyone, and i don't need a psychiatrist either, because they can't simply understand my thoughts.
Please don't attempt to make a reply to this you think is funny, because it most likely will not.

 

Ello gov....
..leaves

 

Nice choice with the Richard Dunn profile pic. That man was a legend.

 

welcome to the starbound community

 

Welp I don't know how, but I read that whole thing. I don't really know what to say about it, but you seem alright to me. Welcome to the forums, man!

 

First I was like, hmmm, tl;dr... Then, against my better judgement, I read it anyway... Sorry, honestly I wish I didn't...

 

Its never late to introduce your self !
ReWelcome to the forums!