Forced seppuku, if you make sure they live as long as possible. Coating the blade in a little something extra never hurts (except for the victim).
Try a Polymorph without the extra dimensional mass storage. Their bones will grind against one another, and rip their musclkes to shreds, and yet theyll still keep turning into a Twilight fan :P
Try using ice magic to freeze them, then set them up in flames! Then, for the cake topper, summon a black hole to devour them!
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