StarBound's Release Date Revealed! [fictional]

Sgt. Sprocket · Dec 7, 2012

Яetrospekt said: ↑

15 days til' what?
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2012.
Supposedly 12/21/12 at 11:11 AM is the end of the world. SUPPOSEDLY.

Arretez · Dec 7, 2012

Sgt. Sprocket said: ↑

I'm pretty sure Tiy is looking at this thread and is being tormented by the thought of how much we will flip out when he DOES give a release date.
Stop scaring him!
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When he does give us a release date, the forum members shall all chant in perfect harmony:

Яetrospekt · Dec 8, 2012

Sgt. Sprocket said: ↑

2012.
Supposedly 12/21/12 at 11:11 AM is the end of the world. SUPPOSEDLY.
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This should be fun, even though it's already pasted since it was on a leap year.

Marshall.Duke · Dec 8, 2012

Яetrospekt said: ↑

This should be fun, even though it's already pasted since it was on a leap year.
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*Ahem*

Marshall.Duke said: ↑

Sorry to bring this up after a good week or so, but you sir, are wrong terribly wrong. The Mayan calendar and the Julian calendar are two different things, the Mayan calendar doesn't have leap years because it doesn't need them its nothing but a segmented countdown with pictures. The true astrological calendar that we should be using has 13 months each month having 28 days, every week still has 7 days making each month last exactly 4 weeks, this works just fine and does not require an "imaginary day". The creation of the Julian calendar is known as "the mistake in time" Because it had one major flaw that would not allow it to work UNLESS it had a leap year. Why would the Mayans be using a Julian calendar? They never even came in contact with European civilization (until Spain killed them all).
The Mayan prophecy of 2012, is translated to our 2012. Its not actually written in arabic numerals on the Mayan calendar "2012" The Mayan calendar was a countdown calendar, so it could easily be converted using hours, days, minuets, the unaltered units of time.
Again, Leap year only applies to the Julian calendar (the one that we use today), as the Julian calendar is flawed, and requires such an annual correction.
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Bamseper · Dec 9, 2012

Marshall.Duke said: ↑

*Ahem*

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Ah, so that's how it works...

Arretez · Dec 14, 2012

The Oreo knows all:

Jake_Skuller · Dec 15, 2012

Arretez said: ↑

The Oreo knows all:
View attachment 17705
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Saw this at 9gag before ;D

-Red- · Jan 5, 2013

Ahem... so... yeah.... it would seem that I have made an error... My bad. ^_^;

SilencedSouls · Jan 8, 2013

I like that you're also the 69th post.

snaketears · Jan 15, 2013

............................

Arretez · Jan 15, 2013

snaketears said: ↑

............................
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Oh boy! Are we talking in Morse Code? Let me try!

.. .----. -- / --- -. / .- / -... --- .- - / .-- .. - .... / .- / -.-. --- ..- .--. .-.. . / --- ..-. / .-- .- -.-. -.- --- ... .-.-.- / ... .... .- -.- .. -. --. / -- -.-- / .... .. .--. ... / .- -. -.. / -.. .. .--. .--. .. -. --. / -- -.-- / ..-. .- - / - --- . --..-- / .. -. / - .... . / .-- .- - . .-. ! / - .... .. ... / .--. .- .-. - -.-- .----. ... / --. . - - .. -. --. / .... --- - - . .-. ! / .. - .----. ... / ... --- / .... --- - / .. - .----. ... / ... - ..- .--. .. -.. .-.-.-

BeastsBloom · Jan 16, 2013

2 bad it didnt come out

Siloquin · May 6, 2013

Arretez · May 6, 2013

Siloquin said: ↑

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That was... very sad... It didn't really help that I was listening to somewhat sad music at the time, either. This wont happen to us though, right? I mean, we're loyal fans. We'll always wait. Even if we die of famine, we'll wait as ghosts. I mean, it has to come out eventually, right? Right? Right?

MoMoBig · May 6, 2013

-Red- said: ↑

Fellow members of the Starbound community! Anyone who's ever been in the chatroom for at least 5 minutes will have heard someone come in and ask "What is StarBound's release date?" and the answer is usually "not decided/late summer/later this year" Well, earlier today a Moderator named Photostyle gave a different answer. He states that the release date would be revealed on one of the most primitive timetables in history. As others contemplated how a release date would be formed via abacus my mind drifted elsewhere... suddenly, realization hit me like a ton of bricks. I made haste to do some research...

...after hours of screwing around on Tvtropes and macromeme, I decided to actually get some work done. I quickly got onto google and looked up ancient civilizations that were closely related to the stars. My search came down to two civilazations:

EGYPTIANS

MAYANS

I started with the Egyptians but in the end I didn't have much luck. The Mayans seemed more fruitful, as even today their prowess with Astrology even without modern day equipment is remarked upon by modern star gazers is highly revered, but in the end I was having no luck and was just about to give up... untill I saw this:

At first I just got a small chuckle at how silly this man looked, and then immediately felt bad at my ignorance to other people's cultures. But as I stared more at the picture I couldn't help but feel like... like I've seen it somewhere before... Sometime recently... it almost looked like... like... . . .

No... it... it couldn't be! That's impossi-

. . .

No! My mind must just be going off on a tangent... surely the mesoamerican style of the Avians is just Chucklefish being inspired by the culture... right? That Mayan Birdman Warrior... it's all just coinidence.

...right?

I couldn't let this go. I had to look further. Deeper. I needed to get to the bottom of this. i couldn't help but laugh in my fervor, here I am looking at the correlation between ancient Mayan culture and an alien race from an unreleased videogame when originally I just came from an offhanded comment about the release date. Silly, right? As a true fan I should just be patient. After all, all I know for sure is that it will be released this year.

...this year.

Wait.

. . .

OH MY GOD!!!

It all makes sense... Starbound. The Mayans being unreasonably gifted with studying the stars. Birdmen. How could we not have seen this before, oh blind are we for so many centuries and the answer has been right there all along! My friends. Companions of space. The mayan calender does NOT stop at the end of the world as we originally believed. No. Rather, all this time, it has been counting down to the release of StarBound!!!

But how! How could these people even know about StarBound? Could they see into the future? Could the Avians be a real race that descended from the stars and taught the ancient, uncivilized mesoamericans their culture, molding them into what we know of now as the Mayans? Perhaps they Calender was made for when the Avians' knowledge of the galaxy, nay, the universe would once again be released to the world. But... why a computer game? How can this all match up? Someone had to know of this... someone had to be connecting the two... It didn't take me long to find out who.

Tiy

Think about it, apparently he was part of the Terraria development team but has anyone actually HEARD of him? As far as I know the only two people who were part of Terraria was Reddigit and Blue. Who is this Tiy who suddenly appears out of nowhere and begins bringing this ancient Mayan prophecy to fruition? Perhaps he posted on the Terraria forums which I never visited? No, no time to do fact checking, clearly I am right. This is the only explaination that makes sense. Tiy is actually an archeologist who discovered the true meaning of the Mayan calender, but instead of revealing this knowledge to the world, he kept it to himself, using it as a basis for a game which he could make money off of, unknowingly bringing the prophecy to realization.

And there you have it. If anyone wants to know when StarBound will be released, just look to the Mayan Calender. However, I myself can't make heaads or tails of the thing so I still can't give you an exact date from it. But surely at least ONE person here has knowledge of ancient Mayan design and can decipher the calender and give a date for us all. Untill then... we'll just have to wait patiently, after all, this is a predetermined event. i thank you all for your time.

[This, of course, was a gag thread. As far as we know anyway... Than you for reading the whole thing and I hope you all got a good laugh out of it]

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tiy was a great owner of star bound BUT THAT IDOT SHOULD OF NEVER STOLE MY TIME MAHCINE TO SEE THE PEEPS OF THE OLD DAYs!

p.s tiy is awsome this is a joke

J-block · Jun 3, 2014

Relic the Philosopher said: ↑

Hey wouldn't it be funny if some kind of natural disaster happened that destroyed all of Central America on the presumed date of the end of the Mayan calender?
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hahahahaha nope

Jonesy · Jun 3, 2014

Relic the Philosopher said: ↑

Hey wouldn't it be funny if some kind of natural disaster happened that destroyed all of Central America on the presumed date of the end of the Mayan calender?
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No, natural disasters have this tendency to not be funny.

SweFox · Jun 3, 2014

What an old juicy thread.

macodelo · Sep 28, 2014

Just wanted to point out, they were a cyclical culture, so whatever translation said the "End" cometh, in actuality, it is just a new "cycle" that begins, but somehow the word "world" comes I to play and everyone thinks that.

Otherwise, they were not that primitive, but their sense of clocks and calendars are off compared to our modern understanding of what "time" relatively is and how our clocks today are arguably more accurate.

This is an old juicy thread...

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StarBound's Release Date Revealed! [fictional]

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StarBound's Release Date Revealed! [fictional]

Sgt. Sprocket Parsec Taste Tester

Arretez Spaceman Spiff

Яetrospekt Pangalactic Porcupine

Marshall.Duke Scruffy Nerf-Herder

Bamseper Ketchup Robot

Arretez Spaceman Spiff

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-Red- Big Damn Hero

SilencedSouls Phantasmal Quasar

snaketears Void-Bound Voyager

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