Defend Yourself!

Not in this timeline.

The next poster broke the multiverse.

 

Should've built it sturdier.

The next poster stole the icing from my cake.

 

IT WAS DELICIOUS.
The next poster destroyed Earth by using rumors.

 

Hey, tweeting fake news paid the bills.

The next poster just isn't cute.

 

You're right, I'm a living blockade.

The next poster is afraid of the water.

 

I am fire, it makes sense.

The np has extreme allergies.

 

Pineapples are evil. But its not an extreme allergy.

The next poster doesn't even bother defending themselves in this thread anymore.

 

Ehh...

NP denies existence.

 

That is because I do not exist.

The NP draws in MS Paint.

 

I have no money or skill, but at least I have dignity!

NP doesn't worship God the Scorpion.

 

Sorry, I sold my soul to Chaos Undivided already.

The next poster keeps misplacing all my stuff.

 

I'm merely trying to rearrange it better!
The Nexy Poster has copied Trump's haircut or has a similarly ugly haircut.

 

I'm going to the barber later to #makemyhairgreatagain

The next poster stole the donations box.

 

All that money should have been donated to me in the first place!

The next poster is a disgusting weeaboo! (I don't actually find all weeaboos disgusting unless by weeaboo you mean those super perverted ones.)

 

You are half wrong.

I'm not a weeaboo...

The next poster did a thing that made a thing become something else, which means anything other than what they were intending.

 

It seemed like a good idea at the time, and nuclear launch codes are overrated anyway.

The next poster keeps on ringing random doorbells in the middle of the night.

 

I have to pee...

The next poster isn't letting me in!

 

My landlord doesn't allow pets, and calves most likely count as those, sorry.

The next poster broke my printer cable.

 

It was revenge.

 

Your honour, I can't defend my client if there is nothing to defend him/her against.

NP likes cheese pizza