Corrupt a wish V.2

granted. they all KABOOM! On you.

I wish for another trip to scuttle town.

 

Granted, but a purple cloaked assassin kills you with a poisoned crossbow bolt.

I wish I could speel.

 

Myönnettäköön, voit nyt kirjoittaa vuonna suomeksi.

I wish I didn't have these feels.

 

Granted, you're Stone Cold and that's the bottom line cause you said so!!

I wish for a new Gator bat.

 

Granted, it mauls you.

(Also, I am fine with this)

I wish I could find consoling words.

 

granted. you can only say playsation 4.

I wish for a tinkerbat

 

Granted, it installs Windows 10 on every single thing. Every single thing.I think the cat just rebooted......

I wish to be more huggable.

 

Granted, you inspire World Hug 3 and it's going national! Surprise hugs around every corner!

I wish to be un-mauled please..

 

Granted, they glue you back together... IN HELL!

I wish for a massive roman candle.

 

Granted. But now you must face me in glorious firework combat and my old battle-burned winter coat still fits!

I wish for goggles that fit over my glasses, I'll need to see to aim.

 

Granted.....BEER GOGGLES!!!

I wish I could kick Satan's butt, there's a new badass in town!

 

Granted. You sell him your soul, in exchange he lets "beat" him up

I wish to have a real Alucard Luftrauser

 

Granted, but he falls in love with a character from another anime, and the universe falls apart.

I wish I was more motivated to do my homework.

 

Granted, but you are unmotivated to do anything else.

I wish I had a crusader helmet.

 

Granted, but you can never take it off. (Heck you and your ninja ways)

I wish for

T R U E P E R P E T U A L I T Y

 

Granted, but it will soon fade off and you will perish like everyone else.
I wish I wasn't so lazy.

 

Granted, here's some cocaine.

I wish people wouldn't suffer.

 

Granted, but you have to suffer instead of them.
I wish the wind wasn't so damn strong here.

 

Granted, you have to live without an athmosphere.

I wish I had some fries right now.

 

Granted, they're soggy fries.

I wish for the ability to go back 24 hours so being sick never messes up work again.