Chat Tell Us Your Troubles Thread - advice & friendly chats

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by BloodyFingers, Oct 22, 2013.

  1. SivCorp

    SivCorp Parsec Taste Tester

    I've had a bad dream that followed me around for 10 years. However, one night I partially woke from it enough to change it. I now had a shotgun in my hands.... And I haven't had a problem ever after.

    I think it was when I realized that I alone am in control of my body. My thoughts are mine to accept or reject, same as my actions. Once someone realizes that excuses are just that, and moves their thinking to an action sense.... Then one can be free.

    At least that has been my experience.
     
  2. Surenu

    Surenu The End of Time

    The same difference as between a dream and a lucid dream. You have some control over the situation and you can feel pain, fear and sometimes you can even smell and taste things. The thing is, they usually (but not always) require some traumatic experience to form. I'd suggest seeing a therapist here.
     
  3. Kashmir

    Kashmir Giant Laser Beams

    OMG, I am so sorry @BloodyFingers . I could have sworn I put my post in your weird dreams thread. This is what happens when you get old...you lose it.
     
  4. BloodyFingers

    BloodyFingers The End of Time

    Think nothing of it.

    Should I mention that the Dreamz thread isn't mine? :v
     
  5. Kashmir

    Kashmir Giant Laser Beams

    oops, I thought they both were. Maybe I should start wearing my glasses. I just hate them.
     
  6. Rgbunpro

    Rgbunpro Cosmos Killer

    I've been wondering about something lately, and I wanted to post this in hel's chatroom but with all the uh...stuff going on over there I figured here would be better. Anyway I've been legitimately wondering if I'm only good for a few conversations. Because when I look at my life, there are so many people who I've considered friends who I just slipped away and I haven't spoken to them in a long time. This is both on and offline. Even my best friend when we talk, there's not a lot to talk about. It's weird, I mean it seems like when we had more common experiences between us we talked more. But as it is, most of my friends I have a few good discussions with and then I just...run out of things to say. Then we stop talking and they fade away from me. Now I know that happens a lot in life, you can't really keep every freind you make. But in my case it's even the good ones I just seem to always run out of things to say.
     
  7. BloodyFingers

    BloodyFingers The End of Time

    That happens to me as well.

    I don't know, rgb. I'm not the sort to chit-chat spontaneously like that even among friends. I often drop from conversations midtalk, as if I suffer from ADHD or something (real possibility), or I simply don't really have anything new to report.

    The reason I find talking to elders so much easier is that, pardon if this sounds offensive, they don't mind repeating a subject over and over. Sometimes that gets weary, sure. But I know that if I bring up a subject we talked about at lenght many times before, we can keep the ball rolling. Besides, a lot of them have kids, and who doesn't love to yammer on about their offsprings? That's a veritable source of new things to talk about, especially when they're children. With people closer to my age, unless it is dirty talk, games or comics/manga, I can't really connect to them.
     
  8. Rgbunpro

    Rgbunpro Cosmos Killer

    I live with ADHD, I don't have it myself but the brother I live with and my dad both have it. I find talking with them pretty easy though, that's probably because they're family. It's interesting because when I was in class with my Friends, we had plenty to talk about but then when I had the opportunity to speak to them outside of class I just...didn't. Now that I think of it, I've never really been one to start conversations, I'd rather someone else spoke the first words. I guess that's why I never really texted any of my friends, hmm.
     
  9. BloodyFingers

    BloodyFingers The End of Time

    Yeah, I'm very much the same. I seldom start a conversation myself.
     
  10. Kashmir

    Kashmir Giant Laser Beams

    The reason us old people can repeat conversations is because we don't remember the first one.

    My best friend, we've known each other for 15 years. Sometimes we talk, other times we have nothing to say. The good thing about a true friend is that they don't mind when this happens, and visa versa. A lot of times our conversations go like this..."Just wanted to say hi, have nothing new to talk about. Call you in a week or so". But, we are always there for each other.
    Don't worry about long conversations, just let your friends know you still care and are there if they want to talk.
     
  11. BloodyFingers

    BloodyFingers The End of Time

    speaking of good friends that hasn't been contacted in years, one of mine just sent me an e-mail.
    In my defense, he doesn't really make himself too available either. All he has on social media is skype, I think. And he vanished from there too.
    He said he wanted to talk. Hope it is nothing serious. But he sent that e-mail late at night, and he also asked for my phone number, since he claimed he no longer has it, so I am a bit worried.

    -edit-

    Talked to him. As I feared, he was in a bad place... a friend of his commited suicide after they had a spat and went their separate ways, and his girlfriend dumped him after he tried to get her away from drugs. She was already on antidepressants so the situation was dire. He needed some support and I was more than happy to provide. He is one of my best friends and partners in crime.

    We worked together back when I tried to become an artist. We had this ambition of becoming a mangaka duo. While I abandoned that path, he kept on pursuing his dreams of being a writer. He actually published a few webnovels of his own and even tried to get be back on the game. But I am tapped out artistically.
     
    Last edited: Feb 15, 2017
  12. Werty9

    Werty9 Seal Broken

    Today I got C+ for my assignment and ruined me, I worked so hard last week! I put everything on it.
    And also, I must work to pay my student loan. Balancing between work and study. And no time for pleasure at all. For me, it’s awful. I know that having a college or higher education can also equip a person with better life skills and improves an individual's quality of life. But... That's hard.
    Honestly, I don't any inspiration for study. I got so hard critique for my assignment that it knocked me down and I don't have strength to do something.
     
  13. BloodyFingers

    BloodyFingers The End of Time

    I get you. Boy, do I get you. I no longer have any patience for studies either. Maybe it's the low quality of education here that puts me off. Maybe I'm more of a 'learn by doing' sort of person. Maybe I have ADHD and wasn't properly diagnosed.
     
    Last edited: Mar 11, 2017
  14. I_am_the_Storm

    I_am_the_Storm Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    Common education is great. We learn how to math, how the spell, how to use computers, how act and treat others, and hundreds of other things needed for our life.
    But... Our will (or wish) to be educated and BEING educated is quite different. Not everyone has 'talent' or strenght to learn something, and it's not our fault. We can be smart and intelligent, we WANT to study, but... that isn't proof we can study.
    Also, I'm not feared to admit this; I didn't finished the secondary school. And? Nothing. That 'school fail' doesn't mean I am dumb or stupid. Of course, someone can see it otherwise, like those, who finished the secondary school or high school. I was and I'm still 'hated' for that. But... being un-educated doesn't make a worse person from me or from everyone else. Or does it? I don't know. Yes, as a stupid-one, I cannot get a good job, and behavior of others towards me is somehow different. Yes, I understand, respect, and encourage others to study, if they feel they need to educate.

    So... what's the point of this chaotic post, you say? Let me explain...

    I'm 22 year old man, with passion on certain things. I didn't pass through secondary school, I am alone and probably I will be forever, I've always been recognized as a 'black sheep' of group, my face is like smashed potato, and I don't have any useful skills or abilities for life, so I'm categorized as a poor, different and ugly person, because... education.
    It's not a science. You passed high school? Then you are a good person. Do you have only middle school? Then go away... I'm really sick of this behavior, to be honest.
    BUT... Even a human with high school can be worse than man/woman with middle school. That human with high school can act horribly against others, meanwhile the man/woman can have very nice behavior and can even be smarter in certain things and same is the job they have. Doctor can be worse than your -teoretically- worst nightmare, and woman with no home can be -again, teoretically- blessed by Heavens. It's completely individual, of course. Everyone is unique.

    I'm good with everyone. Personally, I don't care if you are construction worker, archaelogist, soldier, cook, or president himself.
    As far as you don't exceed your education or job above others education and job, we are fine.

    But... for some reason... everyone in my vicinity doing that in the exact opposite way. And all of it start with one thing... Education.
     
  15. BigEaredKittens

    BigEaredKittens Master Astronaut

    Eh, been drinknig morning til' night every week. THink I've become addicted, but at least the rum does me well. Feel decent when drunk on rum. I'm staying away from vodka and tequila. I've found that those two turn me into a salty wet hurricane of misery for hours a day.

    Long short is I've been knocking myself unconcious with alcohol to mitigate some deep seated childhood problems I've had since I was 5 or 6 or whatever. It was the pedos. I was groomed by pedos when I was little and it formed int oan illegal pornography addiction. Back then I was pedo-bait. There's other things that happened, but... whatever. I'm at the point now where I don't even want to be in a relationship, let alone have any sex ever. Not interested.

    Just been in my pajamas stumblin around the house drunk, all filthy cuz not bathing once in over a week at a time. My 9-year-old niece gets a bit weirded out when she sees me like this, so I like to keep to myself. Actually, nobody in my fmaily knows about this stuff, i lie about it saying I'm sick with the flu... when I'm actually vomiting for malcohol poisoning or whatever.

    I had plans for this year, but I think they're gonig to have to wait. Gotta check in with the shrink and go back to the support group to whne about life again. Thinking about killing myself and cooking up plans on how to do so too on a daily basis.

    Hurray for having a non-functional life.
     
  16. I_am_the_Storm

    I_am_the_Storm Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    !!DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!
    I'm not going to lie. I don't know how bad it is, but I'm pretty sure that killing yourself is the worst and dumbest choice you can made, and if you do that, your family will be ruined.
    But I know, how it feels to think about suicide. 4 years ago, I've planed how to kill myself because depression. I've put large knife used for slicing bread on my nec and slide from one side to second. Several times I've tried to jump under the wheels of moving car, or hang myself. I've keep it in secret too, and that was a bad idea. When my mom revealed my 'secret' and then she was like a tornado. She started to helping me out, we visited several psychologists, we made everything to solve this problem. And I'm still here.
    Of course, your case is much worse. Such memories are unimaginable, and very few people can truly understand you feelings. But I'll tell you this: Maybe you think, that your death will solve everything, that your pain from the past will pass away. You know what? I'm sorry to say that, but its bulls**t. Your family will suffer from your loss,
    Is that what you want? I guess not.

    I'm not going to tell you, what to do, I'm not psychologist. But I'l tell you, you should seek the specialized help. The support group you mentioned is a good move.
    Alcohol doesn't help you either, Sex? We can live without it and even without relationship. But you can't live happily with such problem, as you have.

    You are not alone. You have family and friends, who can help you and support you.
    I hope it will helps you, even a little bit, because every small step counts.

    I'm apologize, if I'd been rude, and I'm sorry for using vulgar words.

    And again...
    DON' EVEN THINK ABOUT YOUR LEAVE TO THE OTHER SIDE!
     
  17. BigEaredKittens

    BigEaredKittens Master Astronaut

    Actually, I've already attempted suicide at least 12+ times. Most by putting myself into potentially fatal situations, so I don't have to see it comming quite. There's a whole cocktail of other problems at play too. Been considering checking into a mental hospital for a bit for the past year, but're sorting medical paperwork at the moment, so all the help stuff is a bit on hold til' after.

    Thanks for listen tho. I'll try to lighten up on the bottle and such.


    Anyway, how's you doin' eh?
     
    I_am_the_Storm likes this.
  18. BloodyFingers

    BloodyFingers The End of Time

    As you well know, I am a motorcycle enthusiast and a bit of a biker myself. So if it's dangerous situations we're talking about, I face those constantly. Like lanesplitting between two trucks at 90mph...
     
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2017
    BigEaredKittens likes this.
  19. I_am_the_Storm

    I_am_the_Storm Scruffy Nerf-Herder

    I'm glad you've gathered strength to fight with your problems. This fight will not be easy or short, but I'm sure you can win. Just don't fall into depression or bad mood. These things can send you back to the very beginning.

    But to your question: I'm fine. I've just listening some ear-tearing music, gathering inspiration for writing and drawing, smoking one cigarette after second, and such things. Thanks for asking.
     
    MilkCalf likes this.
  20. BigEaredKittens

    BigEaredKittens Master Astronaut

    yeah. it is a bit unwelcomng tho. therapy events are iffy cuz it's like i have to word things a certain way so therapist don't laugh. just talkin aobut it makes me feel vile nad unhuman, so having someone laugh is kinda.. not good. one of the reasonsi dread it kinda, the therapy.

    You said something about poor education yes? Don't let it get you down. an example for oyu would be my brother. last time i seen he could hardly red or write. still hasn't gotten into college/ But, even tho he struggles with literacy, he makes best to ensue his hcildren do better than he did. I don't think being of lower education level makes you worthless. People can be hapy and good regardless. Good things can be done, yes. Just as much value you have as someone with phD, as human being, I think.
     

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